defining beauty

Yep, she's a Catholic

2011-12-23T09:50:00.000-08:00

Some days just stink. After a night of virtually no sleep with our newborn and then finding out that our church decided we can't use the parish hall for our daughters baptism three days after I confirmed it, I was just in a bad mood. Of course this was also the day of big G's Christmas show at preschool. After leaving late and forgetting the diaper bag which had my camera we finally made it to her classroom, dropped her off, and went up to the chapel to find a seat. Now, big G goes to a Lutheran preschool but she hasn't noticed any differences between their chapel and our church so far. But little G is a very smart little one year old. After we got our seats she started wandering around. A minute later she pointed to the hanging cross, then signed "Jesus" and "where?" then she got all concerned and started looking for him all over, but there was not 1 image of Jesus in the whole place. We couldn't help but laugh at how astute she was. It really made our day.

The Plagues

2011-11-26T11:36:00.001-08:00

As I was studying the plagues in the book of Exodus today several thoughts came to my mind: What if God were to do something of that sort today? What would the plagues of today look like and what would they strike down? The purpose of the plagues in the book of Exodus were to strike down the false gods of the Egyptians and show that the God of the Israelites is the true God (see Ex 12:12 and Num 33:4). So the question is what are our false gods today? We might see the crash of our economy because of our worship of money. We might see massive loss of jobs because of our worship of success. We might see a strike against the sexual act because of our obsession with the pleasure of such acts. What if God sent a series of plague to you specifically, what false gods would he have to strike to show you that He is the true God?

After nine plagues all resulting in the hardening of Pharaoh's heart the most painful of all plagues hits: the death of the first born. God tells his people that in order to save their children they must sacrifice a lamb and spread the blood of the lamb on their doorpost. When the angel of death comes he will see the blood, recognize those families as faithful and pass over that house. What God is asking is not as simple as we might think. The lamb was seen as an Egyptian God and one that was not to be killed. By sacrificing that lamb and spreading its blood on the door the people were advertising to the world that they were rejecting the false gods. Doing so was a risk on their lives. They had to decide between risking their lives and serving the true God. Would we be willing to do this today? If God asked us to publicly risk our lives to show that we serve God would we? And what would like look like today? Maybe it would mean risking rejection because we speak the truth. Maybe it would mean risking appearing "hip" because we refuse the fashions of today that fail to glorify God. Maybe it would mean risking our reputation because we refuse to be present at events were drunkenness and sin abound. Maybe it would mean risking the acceptance of our family in order to follow the vocation God has for us. Maybe it would mean risking the pleasures of the world to fully dedicate our lives to God. Only you know what God is asking you to risk in order to fully serve him.

Through this series of plagues we read over and over again that Pharaoh's heart was hardened. Why does the truth of God harden his heart while softening others? Here is one say to see it: the sun falling on clay will make the clay hard but the same sun falling on wax will melt and soften that wax. The light of God is shining on every heart, the question is do we have hearts of clay or wax? Will be refuse God's truth and grow hard because we don't want to accept it or will our hearts be softened and mold to be more like his as the light reveals the truth to our hearts?

Saints

2011-11-01T08:15:00.000-07:00

Ever have a moment in which you feel like someone is watching out for you? You have someone, indeed many ones. Do you know that you have saints in heaven who love you, whom you do not know but pray for your good unceasingly? Today is their day. May you feel their presence in this life and come to know them in the next. Happy feast of all saints!

Flirty 30's

2011-10-25T17:57:00.000-07:00

One year ago I wrote a blog about turning 30. In that blog I reflected on my nervousness about being the big 3-0. Turning 30 wasn't as bad as I thought and being thirty far exceeded what I ever imagined. I always heard that the 30's are the best years of your life because by the time you are 30 you really know yourself and are settled in to who you truly are. I think the people who told me that were dead on! I can truthfully say that I think 30 was my favorite year thus far. In my 30th year of life I...

1. completed my third year teaching (the longest I have ever been at a single job) and still love what I am doing.
2. completed my first year of grad school in an amazing program that I am excelling in.
3. went to Rome where my faith was deepened and my love for the Saints was set on fire! I also met some amazing friends and prayer warriors from all over the country.
4. fulfilled my new years resolution of running a half marathon and even did it in the goal time I set.
5. went to Mexico and conquered my fear of heights on a giant high ropes adventure (well maybe didn't conquer it totally but I did complete the course).
6. was given the honor of being the godmother to two more perfect little babies (Lukas and Gabriel) who are such a joy to my life.
7. became unable to get going in the morning without coffee which I am told makes me a real working adult ;-)
8. finished out the year running my first (and not last) full marathon!

What a joy 30 had turned out to be. I can't wait to see what 31 has in store!

"I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."

2011-10-17T17:19:00.000-07:00

I long to hear my God say that "I have finished the race, I have kept the faith" and on October 16, 2011 He did. Yesterday I ran my first full marathon (I wrote several weeks ago about the training). I never fully knew how much of a spiritual meditation running a marathon would be.

Two weeks ago I injured my IT band (a thick band of fibrous tissue that runs along the outside of the leg from the hip to the knee to stabilize the leg during activity like running). It is a very common runners injury that has the potential to put you out of commission for a good month. Determined to run I started working with an incredible physical therapist who believed he could get me ready for the race. I knew starting the race yesterday that it was going to be a painful journey but I was committed to crossing that finish line.

The first few miles felt pretty good. I decided to pray the rosary while I ran. I started with the joyful mysteries figuring I would save the sorrowful mysteries and meditation of Jesus' suffering and passion for the end of the race when I expected to feel the pain. About mile 5 the pain set in. My knee was experiencing sharp pains that radiated up my thigh to my hip and down through my shin. I knew I would experience some pain but I did not expect it to start so early. At this point the sorrowful mysteries got called up early. A great friend of mine sent me a text me right before my race letting me know that she had just given birth to her daughter several weeks early. I took miles 5-7 and the prayers of my second rosary and offered it all for baby Hannah to be strong and healthy. As I continued running I begged God to take away the pain so I could finish this race.

Being that the race was in San Francisco I knew that there would be some intense hills. Right around mile 6 we began a mile long hill. All through training I had been dreading those hills and looking forward to all the down hills that would follow those scary climbs. As I started up the huge hill I noticed that it didn't bother my knee as much. The pain went from sharp to a dull ache. Form is very different when running up hills as compared to flat or downhill. To my amazement the uphills were the best possible thing for me. As I got to the top and started the descent I quickly realize that running downhill sent shooting pains through the outside of my knee. This became a great meditation for me. How often do we think we know what is best and worst for us only to find out that the thing we dreaded is the best for us and the thing we desired turns out to be the most painful. Those hills ended up being a huge blessing. I kept praying that in life God would grant me the grace to know that even when something seems scary and terrible, He knows what is best and what seems so bad is often exactly what we need.

I continued to run in great amounts of pain praying for God to take the pain away. About mile13 I realized that it was not God's will for the pain to subside so I started in on the glorious mysteries. As I meditated on the Resurrection and Ascension of our Lord I asked not that God take away the pain but that he give me that grace and strength to endure. THAT prayer He answered to the fullest. As I began to meditate on the third glorious mystery, the descent of he Holy Spirit, I felt the Holy Spirit giving me an extra push to run through the pain. I felt Him offer me a second wind. I kept running and prayed the next two mysteries about Our Lady asking her to be with me as she was with Christ as he bore his pain. I know she was there immediately keeping me going.

It struck me that often in life we ask God to take away our pain and we can get so frustrated when he does not. Instead what if we asked him to give us the strength to bare that pain along with Him? I ran 21.2 miles in pain that never let up and I know it was only possible because God gave me the grace and will to just keep going. I focused on just putting one foot in front of the other and watched as the miles passed by.

At mile 23 I knew the end was near and was ready to be done. Unfortunately at mile 23 my knee was also ready to be done and decided that it didn't want to bend anymore. One again I was not giving up. I was forced to limp and let my other leg take up the stress. With my knee giving out my ankle came to my rescue. I didn't realize until I got to the finish line but my right ankle was really beat up from compensating for my weak knee. Again my mind raced to the teachings of Our Lord. Jesus said that the Church is like a body and all the members are necessary. When one member is weak another can step in and help carry the weight so that they both can make it to the finish line. I have many times in my life seen this among those in the body of Christ and even experienced it during the marathon. My running partner Olivia ran her first marathon with the same injury so she knew what I was feeling. Without me even having to tell her about my pain she lovingly cheered me to the finish line and never left my side. The last mile my body was tired but Olivia cheered me one and just kept saying "you can do this, your mind is strong, don't give up". As we rounded the last turn the finish line was in site. She grabbed my hand and we began almost sprinting to the end. I didn't know I had any energy left but seeing the goal gave me a final push that sent me flying. I pray that one say I fly into the arms of my Lord when I see that ultimate finish line and when I get there I long to hear him say that "I have finished the race, I have kept the faith".

Immediately after crossing that finish line I started screaming in joy and dancing to celebrate. It was the most amazing feeling I have ever experienced. I looked at Olivia and said "I want to do that again!" Runners high was happening for me that afternoon. The pain was a thing of the past. I no longer cared how bad it hurt, I was so excited to have accomplished such an amazing goal. Today I can't bend my knee or walk normal but it was all worth it! I pray that when life throws pain and suffering at me I am able to remember that it is all worth it to get to the finish line!

26.2 miles, are you crazy??

2011-09-05T13:07:00.000-07:00

I am right now 6 weeks away from running my first marathon. As the training runs get longer and longer (16 miles just yesterday) I have been getting a lot of questions about why anyone would want to put there body through such a challenge. So here is my reflection on why I am training to do what seems impossible.

It all started this past New Years. I wanted to make a New Year's resolution that was spiritual because my relationship with God is really all that matters. I was praying about themes in my spiritual journey and the one thing that kept coming up were the words of Saint Paul, "I have finished the race, I have kept the faith" (2 Tim 4:7). I often feel like my journey with God is one of perseverance. He is often asking me to just keep going even when I don't understand or trust. He asks me to keep my eye on the finish line and never stop moving towards it. I decided I wanted a New Year's resolution that would help me meditate on that idea. Knowing that we are body and soul I wanted both to be involved. So I decided that my New Year's resolution would be to run a half marathon. I chose to train for the OC half marathon and make every run a prayer. Every time on a run when I was tempted to stop I would think about my finish line and keep going. I would often think of Our Lord who kept moving all the way to the cross. At times I would repeat these words of Saint Paul over and over again while I ran.

On May 1st I completed the OC half marathon. I was excited to have accomplished my goal BUT if you know me you know that I don't allow myself to do anything half way. I push myself to the limit and demand the best of myself, especially when it comes to the spiritual life. For me being good is never enough, I want to be a saint! Naturally for me anything with the word half in front of it is not enough. So when my good friends Olivia and Chelsea asked if I wanted to train and run a full marathon with them I knew I had to do it!

Training for a full marathon is like nothing I could have ever prepared myself for. Training for the half marathon was actually not all that bad and I believe most anyone is good health can do it. Training for a full marathon though requires a lot of mental commitment. I mentioned that I want to be a Saint right? My training runs for the marathon have given me the opportunity to meditate on what that really means. The Saints endured incredible obstacles and embraced a lot of pain to become truly sanctified. So many times during my training I have thought I wasn't strong enough and was tempted to change my registration to run another half marathon in October instead of the full marathon. I have endured serious knee pain, the loss two toenail (so far), and felt the strain on my body in general. I have had to say no to many other fun activities because I had a strict schedule of runs that I had to follow. When I am tempted to quit though I think of the Saints and how much they must have been tempted to quit and accept just being good instead of extreme lovers of the Lord. I haven't given up yet and with every run I feel myself getting stronger and closer to my goal.

On October 16th I will run 26.2 (don't ever forget the .2) miles and with every step I will ask the Lord through my body to strengthen and sanctify my spirit so that one day along with Saint Paul I will be able to say "I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."

Disclaimer: I will agree that extreme sports like distance running can be dangerous for the body. I just believe that the pay off is greater than the risk.

Yoga 101

2011-08-02T23:05:00.001-07:00

Keeping checking back here and I hope that people are just enjoying the summer and that's why there haven't been posts recently (and not that I killed the blog with my last downer post). Sorry.

Anyway - I've started taking a yoga class. My two pregnancies have left me with I think 3 working muscles in my tummy, and this is my great idea to fit that. So the plan is to be downward dogging every Tuesday night until the summer session is over. This is, however, not the first time I've taken classes with a yogi (or, as a yogi?). There was a brief period that a 5:30am class was a small part of my marriage prep.

Now, I know we're not supposed to judge, and I know that all the following is somewhat shallow of me. But. I could not help from comparing the two instructors. At my first classes, the girl was young, beautiful, in amazing shape, basically one solid muscle. The kind of instructor that has perfect, gravity defying hair, no matter what crazy twist pose she did. She also had no sweat glands.

This new instructor was an older, jolly lady, who I almost didn't realize was the instructor because she was definitely on the heavy side. Not crane lifting heavy, but probably about 50+ lbs. or so over a normal height/weight. She was (and I'm sure you all can see this coming) by far the better instructor. She focused on how we were doing, tailored the class to what poses would help us best. She encouraged questions and laughing (which I thought was a huge yoga/meditation/karma no-no). And, even at one point, stopped the class flow to explain how exactly to hold our hands so we would not get bad habits. Pause the Enya!

My old instructor never noticed that I had my child pose wrong and that I really didn't have the "yoga feet" down. She was busy taking all the poses "a little farther" and I guess thought we'd get used to the class flow and catch up (which is true also). However, although she was gently commanding us to BREATHE, I got the idea she had not let out all the way for some years. And the more I went, the more I realized that this class was only a part of her routine, not her whole exercise. Before class, I would see her on the treadmill at a full. out. run. A scary movie, guy behind me's got a knife run. Then she walked into class, taught, put away her mat and on my way out to the car, I would see her again on the Stephen King run.

Interesting isn't it? Put these two ladies together and I'm sure 99 out of 100 would say that the young, fit one was a walking advertisement for healthy living, but really, she seems tortured by her exercise routine. The new lady, though, seems to understand the purpose of her gentle poses. And I bet has more of an acquaintance with inner peace.

And she can hold pretty much any pose known to man. Then takes it "further."

Leaving the Church

2011-07-08T00:46:00.000-07:00

I have realized over the past few months that a very dear friend of mine is leaving the Church. I've seen for a while that it was coming, but have been afraid of it. In hoping that it would not happen, I have not talked directly about it to him, and have encouraged my husband to not "push" him out of the Church. Sounds like obviously the wrong thing to do now, but at the time I couldn't think what to do.

Now - that he's left - I'm not sure what to do. Sometimes I'm mad and want to beat him with reasons. (In this beautifully ordered world of ours, do you not think God would have an ordered way of worship?) Sometimes I'm sad and want to just ask him how he could believe so strongly and then just leave it all? His God he has worshiped for almost 30 years, just... not important anymore?

I have seen him attack all other authority figures, and knew it was not consistent to believe in the Church, but was hoping his belief in the teachings of the Church would help him see the light about the others. I'm not sure if he still believes in God, but I have a feeling that He is the next to go in my friend's search for importance, or independence, or himself.

This Sunday's reading is about the sower. I've always thought that the fertile ground, or rocky ground was describing different kinds of people, but maybe it's different times in our lives. In the parable, it's just the sower and the ground, God and my friend. There is no third helping person who brings the seed to the fertile ground. So maybe I need to accept that God can handle this relationship - but I keep trying to figure out a way that I can bring him back.

Ears to hear. Am I being called to intercede for my friend? Or is this a lesson for me to trust that God knows how to call His children to Him? I do feel called to pray for him, but feel my prayers inadequate.

Courtship

2011-07-05T11:35:00.000-07:00

Here is a sermon my friend sent me regarding courtship and purity. So great to hear this coming from the pulpit! :)

http://traditionalsermons.com/sites/default/files/Sermon_2011-06-17-Courting.mp3

Find us ready, Lord

2011-06-25T08:17:00.001-07:00

One of our fellow bloggers and I were recently discussing a talk a trusted priest gave, and I found it to be a source of great meditation this week. He spoke of the persecution he foresees as the homosexual agenda gets pushed in our culture, and how he wouldn't be surprised to be imprisoned for hate speech within his lifetime. For us, this could mean we flee the country eventually, if the Church here comes under attack, or we may face serious persecution ourselves. This is not intended to scare or serve as a prophecy. I lean towards a more hopeful outlook for mankind. It is hard for me to believe that people would be so closed to the truth and beauty of the faith. However, I know that Christ himself was crucified, and the blood of the martyrs has strengthened the Church for centuries.

Since this conversation, I have just found myself looking at my daily life. How do I spend my free moments? How am I a witness to others throughout my day? Do I stand up for truth in little ways? Am I afraid to speak of the beauty of the truth, which is true love, to my friends and family members? Am I ready to face persecution?

The reality is, we just never know when we may have our lives or freedom threatened just for being Catholic. I pray that we might all be ready to face whatever trials the Lord sends us knowing the He has won the war, and we have no reason to fear.

Quote of the day

2011-06-23T14:36:00.000-07:00

"The correct theological term for many who label themselves 'liberal' or 'left-wing' or 'progressive' theologians is heretics."

from the Handbook of Catholic Apologetics

Skirts and Pants

2011-06-23T13:02:00.001-07:00

Check out this awesome article!!

http://www.ncregister.com/blog/a-pants-wearing-woman-reflects-on-skirts/

10 Reasons to Dress Modestly

2011-06-14T13:05:00.001-07:00

http://marysaggies.blogspot.com/2011/06/top-10-reasons-women-should-dress.html

Must-Read Catholic Books for Little (or No) Money

2011-06-14T12:56:00.000-07:00

Despite my early protests, I've converted to reading digital books-- in fact, I love my kindle. For any other kindle users, check out this website with links to inexpensive Catholic books for your library:

http://www.thinveil.net/2011/06/building-catholic-ebook-library-on.html

Catholic Feminism?

2011-06-02T12:29:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I need to actually post something in the near future. Until then, here is an article that I enjoyed reading and seemed appropriate for Defining Beauty...

What is a Catholic Feminist?

The "Rapture" this Saturday??

2011-05-18T12:52:00.001-07:00

Think again.

http://www.ncregister.com/blog/major-supernatural-event-this-saturday/

Maternity Photos- Worthwhile?

2011-05-17T07:00:00.000-07:00

A family member of mine is an amazing photographer, and has offered several times to take some maternity photos for me.

This is my second pregnancy, and with my first I hardly took any photos of my bump and I at all. My swelled-up cheeks rivaled those from when I got my wisdom-teeth pulled in 9th grade, and my constant nausea made taking photographs the last thing on my mind. Overall, pregnancy makes me feel self-conscious (everybody openly notices and comments on your body!), and I was not sure that I needed professional photos to remind me of it. Lastly, I've noticed that many women choose to take maternity photos naked(!), and even the thought of my bare belly showing in a photograph makes me uncomfortable.

On the other hand, I hear from many friends that they truly cherish photos from their pregnancies, and are glad they took the time to take them. I also think that it would be a neat keepsake for the child-- to see what his/her mother looked like when he/she was in the womb, and how exciting their arrival was to the entire family. More than anything, I love how pro-life these photos are. They truly celebrate the beginnings of a new life!

I don't think there is a right or wrong answer, but I am curious-- what is your opinion about maternity photo shoots?

Dress Dare Update-- How's it going?

2011-05-16T20:53:00.000-07:00

We are halfway through May (yikes!), and so I thought it would be fun to check in about how the dress dare is going for everyone.

I have to admit that it has been more of a challenge for me this year! Being in my third trimester of pregnancy, I am tempted to choose comfort over anything these days! Often this does mean a dress (who can argue with no waist bands!) , but often it also means my yoga-style pants and supported running shoes.

At the same time, I have also made the observation that overall, pregnancy makes me feel more feminine than ever. Whether I am in workout attire or evening gown, I can't hide my femininity! It is noticeable how many people open doors for me, or offer me a chair to sit down in. Sometimes I even feel as though I am spoken to in a softer tone than usual. All of this reminded me of last year's Dress Dare, when many of you blogged about how people treated you differently when you dressed more femininely.

So... have you stuck to it? How are you doing this time around?

The Rise of the Metrosexual, fall of the Lumberjack

2011-05-15T21:41:00.001-07:00

A recent study has shown that hormonal contraceptives are now being linked to women's attraction to less masculine men. We have written on the blog about the crisis in manhood today, and how difficult it is to find real men in our culture. Surprise, surprise, somehow you can bring it back to birth control.

Women, are naturally drawn to masculinity when they are fertile. Since hormonal contraceptives confuse the body into thinking the woman is pregnant, she doesn't respond to the chemical signals in the masculine man as she normally would. Thus, the rise of the metrosexual. Women on birth control, are actually physically attracted to men with less hair on their chest. The study raises a lot of interesting questions looking at everything from how this affects relationships, to the health of offspring (turns out we are naturally attracted to men with immune systems that complement ours).

See the entire article here: The Tricky Chemistry of Attraction

Dare to Veil? Or not!

2011-05-07T21:23:00.000-07:00

Last May, during our 1st dress dare, I wrote a blog on the chapel veil on daring to don a mantilla in mass. While I suggested this tradition as a way of exploring one's femininity in the presence of the Eucharist, I spoke of how it has not been mentioned since the 1917 Code of Canon Law. It has been debated, mostly since Vatican II, whether it is still required of women to veil or not.

Cardinal Raymond Burke, Prefect of the Apostolic Signatura, basically the Church's Supreme Court Justice, has spoken on the matter, quite clearly. Recently, a woman wrote him directly, asking for clarification on this issue. He responded:

“Thank you for your letter …The wearing of a chapel veil for women is not required when women assist at the Holy Mass according to Ordinary Form of the Roman Rite. It is, however, the expectation that women who assist at the Mass according to the Extraordinary Form cover their heads, as was the practice at the time that the 1962 Missale Romanum was in force. It is not, however a sin to participate in the Holy Mass according to the Extraordinary Form without a veil.”

So there it is. If you are in Tridintine Mass (Extraordinary Form), it is expected that you wear a veil, but in the ordinary form, do whatever you like! If you do desire to wear a veil, there is a real dare to veil campaign going on, interestingly enough!

The Beauty of Dresses

2011-05-03T22:48:00.000-07:00

Since the last dress dare, I have only worn jeans a handful of times without a tunic type shirt, and otherwise, it's been skirts and dresses. I felt very convicted to stick with it when the dare ended. Since last May, I have also completed a pregnancy, and lost the baby weight (I think, I try to avoid the scale). Each of the few times that I put on pants without a long shirt/dress over, I found myself so insecure, so self-conscious.

I was so aware of how big my hips, thighs, waist, were. I was perfectly healthy, and either pregnant, or post-partum, but I felt so guilty every time I put on my jeans. I fit in my pre-pregnancy jeans a few months after delivering our 2nd child, but nonetheless, even though they fit my waist, I was more aware of any weight gain in my bum, or otherwise. In my dresses and skirts, I didn't notice the slight changes that might occur on a day to day basis from the holiday treats, or a busy week without time for workouts.

I have come to realize that for me, jeans are the devil's playground. It may not be that way for all women, but for me, that is what this dare made me realize in the last year, so I am doing my best to avoid them altogether. The Lord wants us to know that our beauty lies within our soul, not in our physique, and as long as we're healthy, and caring for our temple, then we have nothing to worry about. I am wearing my dresses and skirts because they help me stay focused on true beauty. Pay attention this month, and see if you notice a difference when you look in the mirror.

Peace

2011-05-03T13:56:00.000-07:00

I logged on to my facebook account yesterday and felt a knot form in my stomach when reading the status comments all over my news-feed. USA "Chants" and celebratory comments such as "Take that Bin Laden" were everywhere.

As relieved as I am to be rid of the threat that this man posed to so many people, it sickens me to see Americans on the news celebrating a person's death as though they just won a sporting event. As somebody mentioned to me, it makes us no better than watching videos of Al Qaeda celebrate their victory of the 9-11 terrors.

Of course, the Church responded quickly, and I think that their statement sums it all up:

"In the face of a man's death, a Christian never rejoices, but reflects on the serious responsibilities of each person before God and before men, and hopes and works so that every event may be the occasion for further growth of peace and not hatred."

(Vatican, May 2, 2011)

I also enjoyed this post on the National Catholic Register. "Let's pray"...

Dressed for the Sacrament

2011-05-03T13:41:00.000-07:00

It is hard to host a dress dare without mentioning THE gown that everybody is talking about this week. Needless to say, I won't shock anyone by stating that it is one of the most beautiful wedding dresses the public eye has seen lately!

A little over three years ago, I was searching for a wedding dress, and was utterly surprised by the lack of options. Although I realize that it has become common to get married outdoors (or wherever you want) in the past years, I assumed that since many brides still do get married in Churches, appropriate gowns would be available somewhere! Sleeves like Kates' were definitely not an option in most bridal boutiques, and even finding a gown with straps was a challenge! The endless racks of designer wedding dresses all resembled a white version of the (strapless) party-dress-- definitely not something to wear while receiving my vocation sacrament in front of our Lord's tabernacle.

I ended up finding a gown that I loved for my reception-- and my mom sewed a beautiful bolero for me to wear during our marriage ceremony. It is funny because looking back, I love the photos of my gown with the bolero more than without!

Why is it that Catholic brides are not covering up their shoulders in Churches these days is definitely a question that I wonder often. Perhaps we haven't been loud enough about asking designers to give us more modest options. Nevertheless, I have much hope that all of the positive response about Kate's dress will start providing brides with alternatives to the tube top.

Dress Dare 2011!

2011-05-01T10:40:00.000-07:00

Here we go!

The Official Rules are:

Wear dresses and skirts throughout the month of May.

Exceptions: Snoozing {zzz} and Exercising.

Honor Mary, grow closer to Jesus.

Be beautiful--- be YOU!

Leave comments or email DefiningBeautyBlog@gmail.com to let us know how it is going!

It's almost Divine Mercy Sundae!

2011-04-28T14:39:00.000-07:00

This is just too simple and too cute not to share...

http://catholicicing.blogspot.com/2011/04/celebrate-divine-mercy-sunday.html

Hello Spring!

2011-04-26T12:51:00.000-07:00

The month of May is approaching quickly, and I have heard a few mentions of whether our bloggers and readers will be challenging each other to another Dress Dare. Last year's dare was a bit of an experiment, to see whether what we wear encouraged us to embrace our femininity. We also thought that wearing dresses and skirts would serve as a daily reminder of Christ, similarly to how our lenten observances do.

So... Any thoughts? What do you all think? Should the Dress Dare become an annual event?

Hug your father today

2011-04-22T03:00:00.000-07:00

Last year I posted this on the fifth anniversary of my dad's passing from stage-four pancreatic cancer. I won't write it out again, but check it out if you want to read about my selfishly-created holiday, Hug Your Father Day.

Today, on Good Friday, I hope you'll join Catholics around the world in praying the Holy Rosary. I pray for a solemn and hopeful Holy Week for you, and a joyful celebration of Easter on Sunday and thereafter.

But I also want to remind you to celebrate life around you. If possible, give your dad a hug today and tell him you love him.

It would mean a lot to me.

God bless.

St. Augustine of Hippo

2011-04-13T16:39:00.000-07:00

St. Augustine of Hippo

The girls will hopefully forgive me for breaking the trend of female saints we’ve explored here so that I can post on one of my favorite saints of all time: St. Augustine. And considering I posted on St. Monica a few weeks ago, I thought it’d be fitting to continue.

I like saints who are writers. As a writer myself, I tend to have a soft spot for other saints who've taken up the craft (St. Paul and St. John, to name a few); and St. Augustine's story is so hopeful to me. To reiterate what I mentioned about St. Monica (his mother), he was born into a position of wealth to a Christian woman and a pagan father (who was also an official). St. Augustine’s youth was anything but holy. He lived a worldly, materialistic life that included adultery, persecution of the Christian faith and a rejection of his mother’s Catholic beliefs. Later, in his writings “The Confessions of St. Augustine”, he would talk about the struggles with purity he’d fought his whole life, even after his conversion in his thirties. We all know one quote associated with St. Augustine: “Give me chastity and continence, but not yet,” which I think is an accurate representation of how a lot of us approach our sins, whether they’re against chastity or anything else we find ourselves repeating again and again in that confessional to the priest who’s heard us sigh and confess to the same sins (sometimes in the same order even).

And that’s why St. Augustine’s such an inspiration to me: he gives me hope. Here’s an extreme sinner that was able to find love and peace through faith. I’ve read “Confessions” a few times (one of my favorite books of all time), and the sense I get from St. Augustine is this: “If I can find peace and commit myself to a life of holiness, there’s hope for anyone.” Not to put him down, but it’s true!

I think we all know someone in our lives who seems to be a St. Augustine figure, someone who’s turned away from the Church, or maybe never was part of the Church at all, but lives a life of unhappiness and self-destruction. I know someone, fitting that description, who’s gone through hell and high water, and every time I hear an update on his life, all I can think of is how there must be a plan or purpose for all this.

St. Augustine, pray for us!

The Wonder-Worker

2011-04-12T13:30:00.000-07:00

She is deemed the "wonder-worker" quite appropriately. Although we have few details on St. Philomena's life, we know the Lord worked wonders surrounding her death as a virgin martyr, and that she continues to work wonders to this day. This pretty princess, (she was a Grecian princess known for her beauty and for this reason, the Roman Emperor Diocletian wanted to marry her, but she consecrated herself to Christ as the age of 11) changed my life in more ways than I can count. I seriously can't stress enough how much I love this girl. Seriously. My husband proposed in the Roman catacombs with the ring inside her tomb (a little creepy if you're not Catholic), and we visited her sanctuary on our honeymoon, staying in the room of St. John Vianney, above her relics! Super, super cool. Many have found her to be helpful in the most hopeless of causes. She is the patroness of purity, youth, the imprisoned and much more.

I tend to think that the saints find us, not the other way around. They are our big brothers and sisters in Christ that can mentor us, lead us by their example, and help out when we need it, because they've been a child of the same parent, and they know better than us what to do and not do. I feel that sisterly bond with St. Philomena. Should you ever seek her aid in anything, just know that she is a teenager. She is hopelessly in love with her spouse, Christ. Before she delivers what you've asked, things usually get worse before they get better. It's what happened to her. She was imprisoned for 40 days and on the 37th day, Mary visited her and told her, "I am sending my archangels Raphael and Gabriel to help you, BUT first, 3 days of torture and then, your death." A crown of virgin martyrdom awaited her. She was faithful, and expects the same of her devotees. She also likes to make deals (hence, my daughter's name, Mina). If you keep up your end of the bargain, she'll keep hers. Just don't go back on your word. I've heard stories... And it's rather fitting that she died a virgin martyr at age 13, because I think that is when so many of the teens in our culture die spiritual deaths due to the sins of the flesh. She is the patroness of purity, and there is a tradition of wearing a cord of red and white around one's waist, as a devotion to her, and sort of like a chastity belt. It is a great reminder.

So if you have any prayer requests, don't hesitate to call upon St. Philomena. She definitely has a special place in the heart of Mary and Jesus, because they tend to pay attention to her intercessions. Get to know her...http://www.philomena.us/

Also, if you do ask her for her help, please toss in a prayer for a very sick little girl named Blaise. It is through her that St. Philomena came to me, and many others.

St. Martha

2011-04-10T00:25:00.000-07:00

St. Martha is one of those saints that get a bum deal. You know, like "doubting Thomas" and Adam and Eve... saints that are mostly remembered for the dumb things they said (or did) once and not all the rest. Seriously - you complain about your sister ONCE and everyone remembers you as stick-in-the-mud-Martha...

So I thought it was really interesting when I heard once that Martha is a recognized saint, while Mary (her sister who "chose the better part") is not. Sounds weird, right? Well, even though Mary was praised by Jesus, and is, most likely, in Heaven with Him, she never came out and stated her belief in the Gospels. Martha, on the other hand, did proclaim her faith when she went out to meet Jesus when he came to rise Lazarus.

Thinking about these two helps me a couple ways:

1) as a natural invert, I find myself sitting around thinking, thinking, thinking about things (sometimes even holy things!) and never get around to acting on them. It's good to think about Charity, but if I don't get around to actually being charitable, I'm a resounding gong. I need to be more like St. Martha, don't wait around for Jesus, go out and find Him! and

2) Just because I've chosen wrong in the past, doesn't mean that I can't move past it. I mean, Martha could have wallowed in the fact that she chose the worse part and that really could have affected her relationship with Jesus. But, instead, she feels like she can still go to Him, and has confidence in Him, even when she thinks He was recklessly tardy. "If you had been here, my brother would not have died."

St. Martha, faith so strong you can chide Jesus and still end up a saint, pray for us!

St. Joan of Arc

2011-04-04T21:19:00.000-07:00

I was reading the March edition of Columbia (the Knights of Columbus magazine) and one of the articles was on 3 saints of war: St. Martin of Tours, St. Joan of Arc and well, I don't remember the third...I found St. Joan of Arc so interesting and brave putting all her trust in God and taking charge of the French army. When deciding on who to write about for the martyrs week she seems like a great choice.... Born in 1412 Joan was a peasant girl from the eastern part of France. When she was about 12 years old she was in a field when she had a vision. St. Michael, St. Catherine and St. Margaret appeared to her several times. At first the visions were general and not personal but then when she was 16 years old the saints appeared to her and told her to go to King Charles and help him reconquer his kingdom. The Hundred Years War was going on at the time and the English were trying to take over France. Joan went to the king and the king granted her permission to go with a small army and fight. Many people opposed the kings' decision of letting a girl into the army but Joan knew she had to fight for her country and for God. She took her army and raised the seige of Orleans on May 8, 1429. Throughout the next year she and her army enjoyed many more victories for France. King Charles was able to go into Rheims and be crowned with Joan by his side. But the war was not over yet and in May of 1430 while trying to recapture Compiegne, she was captured by Burgundians and sold to the English when King Charles and the French didn't come save her. Joan was put on trial and by refusing to retract her statements that it was the saints of God who commanded her to do what she did, she was condemned to death and burned at the stake on May 30, 1431 at the age of nineteen. What a strong, faithful woman she was! Putting all her trust in God to do His Will and to win back her country. I am definitely going to start praying to St. Joan of Arc now for her protection and strength to stand up for Christ in my everyday life. To live for Him as she did and to teach my 3 sons to do the same. I have my own little army-in-training right now! St. Joan of Arc is the patroness of soldiers and of France. Her feast day is May 30th. St. Joan of Arc, pray for us!

St. Gianna

2011-04-01T15:41:00.000-07:00

There are many things I love about St. Gianna, but I think more than anything, I am inspired by the fact that she lived such an (extraordinarily) ordinary vocation in today's world. She is a "girl-next-door" kind of saint, or at least I imagine she was this way. Of course, I don't doubt that a conversation with her would have exuded great holiness, love and joy, but even through this, she is a woman that might have attended a family wedding, or a parish picnic.

Gianna Beretta Molla was an Italian, born and raised in a devoutly Catholic family. She volunteered many hours for young people and the elderly, while also earning her degree in Medicine and Pediatrics. In her early thirties, she met and married Pietro Molla, and dedicated herself to raising a "truly Christian family". She soon after had three children, and continued to balance her family life while working in medicine part-time and accepting that her husband travelled abroad frequently for his own career!

During the early months of her fourth pregnancy, Gianna found out that she had developed a fibroma in her uterus. Although advised to abort, she continued to trust in God and carry on with her pregnancy. She prayed for her child's health and for a safe delivery for this little life. A few days before the child was due, she was ready to give her life in order to save that of her child: “If you must decided between me and the child, do not hesitate: choose the child - I insist on it. Save him”.

Despite all efforts and treatments to save both of them, on the morning of April 28, about a week after baby Gianna was born, the Saint died. She was 39 years old.

Being a new wife and mother, I truly feel that St. Gianna can relate to many of my prayers. In reading some of her letters to her husband, I've learned that she struggled and was likely sanctified through little things such as fatigue, pregnancies, and the everyday crosses of marriage and motherhood. For this, I feel so grateful that the Church gave us her example to follow. St. Gianna, pray for us!

St. Faustina

2011-03-30T07:00:00.000-07:00

Being an eighties baby, (as well as Polish on my mother’s side) John Paul II was THE pope for my generation. While we love and adore Benedict, the magnitude of love that JPII professed in his vocation was without a doubt one of the best examples of how to love as Christ loved. But instead of talking about the wonderful Karol Wojtyła, today I want to talk about the quiet saint through whom John Paul II brought us the wonderful Chaplet of Divine Mercy, Sr. Maria Faustina Kowalska.

Divine Mercy Sunday is the second Sunday of Easter, a holiday the late John Paul II established in 2000 in honor of St. Faustina’s mystic visions of Christ in the 1930s in her native Poland.

Called to be a nun at an early age, Sr. Faustina was visited by Christ multiple times, asked to spread to mercy of God to the people around her. One of the visions we know quite well is the painting of our Lord with His right hand raised, a stream of blood and water coming from His heart, and the words “Jesus, I trust in You” written underneath. Sr. Faustina instructed an artist to paint for her the portrait of Christ, but I remember reading (and I can’t find the source right now) any artist’s rendition was never quite as magnificent as her vision.

From the diary of Sr. Faustina (which, in of itself is quite remarkable, considering her limited knowledge of writing due to not many years of education), we learn about the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, a prayer said using Rosary beads, the words of which Christ promised will grant mercy to those at the hour of their death. According to Sr. Faustina’s diary, the Chaplet prayers are threefold: obtaining mercy, trusting in Christ’s mercy, and showing mercy to others.

Thank you to this wonderful saint for bringing us the words of God in such a beautiful prayer!

(To say the Chaplet of Divine Mercy, start with the Sign of the Cross, then say the Our Father, the Hail Mary and the Apostles’ Creed. On the Our Father beads of the Rosary, say the first part of the prayer. On the ten Hail Mary beads that follow, say the second part of the prayer. After five decades, say the third and fourth part of the prayer three times.)

“1. Eternal Father, I offer you the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity, of your dearly beloved Son Our Lord Jesus Christ in atonement for our sins, and those of the whole world.

2. For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

3. Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One,

4. Have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Amen.”

The Mother of Simple Love

2011-03-28T18:07:00.000-07:00

Perhaps the most well known "saint" of the 20th century, although she's only beatified at this point, is Blessed Mother Theresa. This tiny nun touched the world with her wit, her strength, but more than anything with Christ's love. To me, the most inspirational aspect of her ministry, is that she didn't dream of impacting the world, her goal was to "do small things with great love."

Mother Theresa went about her life, LOVING. She loved the poor, the hungry, the sick, the unlovable, in the eyes of so many. She did this despite a dark night of the soul where she did not feel God's love or joy, yet she filled so many with the love and joy of Christ because she persevered in letting her actions show it. There is so much to learn and take from her example, particularly when we live in a country that is so rich in physical means, but so poor in spirit. Let us remember her words:

"We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do."

"We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked, and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved and uncared for is the greatest poverty. We must start in our own homes to remedy this kind of poverty."

"Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person."

"Each one of them is Jesus in disguise."

"I have found the paradox, that if you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only more love." (this quote was what inspired my devotion to Blessed Mother Theresa)

Her words are so simple, yet drenched in wisdom. I encourage you to keep her in mind this lent, and try to remember to smile at everyone you encounter throughout your day. If you have nothing nice to say, smile, and if you feel sad, do an act of charity. Do not just give alms, give of yourself.

St. Radegonde

2011-03-26T13:43:00.001-07:00

The last time I saw my sister's Mother Superior, she said to me "When you go back to the States, you must spread word of St. Radegonde. No one knows about her."

Realizing "Hey - you know this great saint, St. Radegonde..." wasn't the best conversation starter, I immediately thought that I would have to name a child after her. Funny that it didn't occur to me that Radegonde doesn't make for the best child's name either.

But six years later, I find myself explaining who Radegonde is, how to pronounce her name correctly, and yes, that my daughter's middle name is after a dragon slayer.

A dear friend of mine visited my sister's convent for a while and would send out Europe Updates. Of all the descriptions of St. Radegonde's life, I still love her's the best. So below is my friend's Life of St. Radegonde...

"I guess you need some background on St. Radegonde before you can really appreciate this story. Radegonde was the queen of the Franks in the middle of the sixth century, but she was not happy about it. If you remember from your history class, the first Christian king of the Franks was Clovis. He had two sons who became kings after his death. Unfortunately, these sons did not appreciate the whole "God is Love" aspect of the gospels, and they went about burning and pillaging lands bordering their kingdom. They invaded Thuringia (now in Germany), killed the king, and captured his two young children, ten-year-old Radegonde and her little brother. Many years passed. When King Clotaire's wife died, he decided that he wanted to marry Radegonde. After being caught trying to run away, Radegonde eventually was forced to marry the king. (Side note: Would YOU want to marry the guy who killed your father? I don't think I would find that kind of guy attractive, personally.) Anyway, Radegonde used her position and wealth to feed the local poor, tend the local sick, and plead for poor souls who were unjustly imprisoned. She would also spend her nights kneeling on the cold stone floor of her bedroom and doing penances.
This went on for a while until the already unattractive King Clotaire cold-bloodedly assassinated his beloved wife's only surviving relative, her little brother. Hint to all men: This is NOT a good way to keep your wife from running away from you, as Clotaire found out. Radegonde ran to the local bishop and gained his permission to leave her husband and join the monastic life. Clotaire was forced to agree to this after one day, after the newly planted oat stalks in the field through which Radegonde was fleeing grew to be over five feet tall, hiding Radegonde from the view of the king.
After this all happened, Radegonde settled in Poitiers, where the king gave her the land to found a monastery, L'Abbaye de Saint-Croix, which I think was on the same piece of land that the convent I am at right now is on, but it was bigger. Now, the part of the original abbey that is left is a curious rock formation that is just off one of the main streets here. Radegonde spent her days praying, taking care of the local sick, and bringing stability to the kingdom by making peace between her two stepsons, who had become kings after their father died. When she died, she was buried in a church named Sainte-Marie-hors-les-murs, which eventually became called St. Radegonde's because so many people went to visit her tomb there. You can actually still go visit her sarcophagus, which is right underneath the altar.
Back to the legend, the story has it that there was a dragon named la Grande Goule that lived in the area around the monastery. This dragon was especially villified because it would eat all the young nuns who ventured out alone after dark. Not good. So, one day, St. Radegonde left the monastery in search of the evil dragon and killed it, thereby winning the admiration of her fellow nuns and of the townspeople.
Side note: The skeptics among you might be thinking "This story is stupid. There are no such things as dragons." Well, have you ever seen the movie Dragonheart? I remember being forced to watch it in the bus taking us to the fateful honors retreat my freshman year of college. I was sitting next to my new buddy Clare, and we were both appalled by the film's lack of, well, anything that makes a movie good. Anyway, the movie puts out the theory that dragons did exist, and that the last dragon was actually a selfless creature who just wanted to help out humanity. The point is: Some weird people do think that dragons existed.
Actually, the real point is that whether or not the story is literally true really makes no difference. It just means that if God would give anyone the strength to kill a nun-eating dragon, he would give it to St. Radegonde because she was so holy.
These days, the Grande Goule is that local den of debauchery, the discothèque, which is found right across the street from the Church of St. Radegonde. I personally would feel very satisfied if the body of St. Radegonde rose up, walked across the street, and put the fear of God into the proprietors of the discothèque, but it probably won't happen."

St. Monica

2011-03-23T07:00:00.000-07:00

I first read about St. Monica going into my first year of university and was absolutely blown away by her story. She was the mother of St. Augustine of Hippo, who’s also an inspiring saint for me (but that’s another blog post). Funny enough, the name “Monica” runs in my family; my sister was named Monica (my dad named her), and my paternal grandmother’s middle name was also Monica.

What’s inspirational about St. Monica is her devotion to prayer, and her incredible patience while waiting for God to change the heart of her (then) pagan son, Augustine. The wife of Patritius, an official in present-day Algeria, and also a pagan, Monica endured a rather lonely Christian life. She made use of it by devoting her time to prayer for the conversion of her husband and son. God’s will was definitely to see those two men become spiritual leaders in the family: Patritius converted to Christianity before his death, and her son went to be a scholar for the Church and then a saint. (The story of St. Augustine is a wonderful story that always lifts me, knowing that there’s always hope for people we think might be beyond hopeless. We can’t forget that!)

As someone who struggles with patience almost daily, St. Monica is a good saint to celebrate and learn about. Imagine, years of praying for the same person to change his or her ways, to find Christ, when after years and years it seems to be getting more and more hopeless. I know true love knows no boundaries, but I truly can’t imagine the doubt she would have been up against throughout those trying years. Compounded with her unhappy marriage to Patritius (abuse and adultery in tow), it would have been quite the difficult life, and years of looking at someone without change would have been daunting.

Now imagine her celebration and joy when those men in her lonely Christian life found refuge in God.

Incredible!

Thank you, St. Monica, for praying for your husband and son!

The Mother of the Mother of God

2011-03-21T21:26:00.000-07:00

A saint who, to me, defines Beauty is the mother of the most beautiful woman to ever exist. Not only did Mary likely resemble her own mother physically, but she was the one who formed her, taught her, and nurtured her. As a wife and mother, I look to St. Anne because she had a holy marriage, as her husband is also a saint, and she raised a saint. When I think of my personal spiritual goals, that's it: for my husband, my children and I to all become the saints God wants us to be. The best way to achieve that, is for me to be a saint...no pressure ;-)

St. Anne participated in the immaculate conception, although she herself, was not conceived without sin. God saw her as a worthy vessel for the most perfect human being ever created. She housed Mary in her womb, and then housed her in her home, preparing her for that fiat that brought our Savior into the world. St. Anne was just like us. We are just as capable as she was of raising saints, of building holy marriages, and of personal sanctity. She was beautiful because she was the woman God wanted her to be, and I bet, considering how beautiful Mary has been reported to be, by those she's appeared to, St. Anne was physically beautiful as well.

So if you are a wife & mother, don't forget this beautiful woman who lived her vocation to the fullest. And if you are a Grandma, remember to pray to St. Anne all the more, because she's Jesus's Grandma!

St. Pelagia

2011-03-18T07:31:00.000-07:00

"Who?"
That's what the bishop who confirmed me said as I approached him and he asked me what name I was taking.

There are actually many accounts of a St. Pelagia it turns out, and many possible feast days. Here's the story of my St. Pelagia (apparently also known as Margaret):

Pelagia was a beautiful and wealthy pagan actress who gave up all of her wealth when she was walking by a church and heard a homily about the Judgement Day given by St. Nonnus. She instantly repented and begged St. Nonnus for baptism. He said the only way for her to be baptized was for her to renounce her profession (during the 5th centtury in Antioch actors were not allowed to be a part of the Church because...well let's just say it was a very dirty profession) and start catechism classes with Blessed Romana, who would later become her godmother. Very soon afterwords she desired to do penance for the horrible life she had led and received a brown habit from St. Nonnus. Then she visited the Holy Sepulcher and all the places where Jesus visited during the passion. She built herself a house on Mount Olive and became a hermittess. People called her "the beardless monk" and it was only after her death that they realized she was a woman. A little tomb was built for her and centuries later people started making pilgrimages there. Stories say that whoever visited her tomb was held there by invisible bonds stronger than any human could ever make until they confessed every sin they'd committed.

Her feast day is October 8.

St. Pelagia, pray for us!

Confirmation Saint - Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha

2011-03-16T03:37:00.000-07:00

Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha 1656 – 1680 (died at 24)

I was confirmed in June of ’98 along with my classmates at St. Clement Roman Catholic Elementary School. Growing up in a Catholic household, and seeing the older students ahead of me going through the rite of Confirmation, I had been thinking about which saint to choose as my patron and representation when the time came. Initially, I was taken by the story of St. Joan of Arc, being strong and faithful to God when the mores of society were against her, her young life, her martyrdom, her strength and her place in a period of European history, which fascinated me as a girl.

But my father had a different idea. I was his first-born, so none of his other daughters had gone through Confirmation just yet. We were alike in many ways, which included a strong fascination of our own Canadian history, especially from the Southern Ontario region. This area is well-known for its First Nations Peoples (“Native Americans” as they'd be known in the States), the Ojibwa and the Mohawk tribes’ histories prominent in local storytelling and art. Not being of First Nations descent, this culture fascinated both of us, and we shared this passion by visiting Martyr Shrine in Midland, Ontario, where there is an adjacent First Nations fort kept intact for history buffs and tourists. We also vacationed yearly to Lake Huron, on the outskirts of First Nations reservations, and would take long walks on the beach together towards the limits of our land.

I don’t remember how it came about, but it was my dad who recommended I take Blessed Kateri’s name as my confirmation name, and the saint as my patron. Since her name was the Mohawk translation of my own, it worked well, and it would mean a lot to him and me, considering our shared passion.

And so I did. I learned about Blessed Kateri and her patronage for the environment, which seemed appropriate, my dad being the gardener he was. I was happy and honored to announce to the bishop on the day of my confirmation that I would take the name Kateri as an adult in the Church, and so I was baptized with the Holy Spirit as Kateri.

The strange – or wonderful – thing about this very meaningful decision is that well after my dad passed away at age 50, I discovered another one of Blessed Kateri’s patronages: Patron of those who have lost parents.

It’s unlikely my dad knew about that patronage.

But thank God for that gift of this beautiful saint praying for me from the time I chose her at age thirteen to today, five and a half years after the passing of my dad, who felt called to suggest her for me.

Please pray for this wonderful woman's canonization!

St. Jane Frances de Chantal

2011-03-15T07:00:00.000-07:00

I cannot say that I am completely proud of how I chose my confirmation Saint. At the time, I saw it as another "homework" assignment to check-off my to-do list. There was nothing prayerful about it at all. I literally googled "St. Chantal", and despite discovering that no St. Chantals have been canonized (yet), I ended up finding St. Jane Frances de Chantal. From there I quickly filled out the information on my worksheet, turned it in, and did not think much of it for quite some time.

College was when I began to dig deeper into my belief in Catholicism, and it was then that I started look to the Saints for their example and their prayers. I quickly learned that God had provided with an amazing spiritual companion for my faith journey.

One of my favorite things about St. Jane Frances de Chantal is that she was a wife to a Baron and mother of six (two of her children died in infancy). Knowing that she experienced the marriage vocation encourages me to turn to her in prayer often, especially when I am struggling with day-to-day challenges. Like many other Saints, St. Jane also had a great love for the poor, and was known around her community for her generosity.

St. Jane's husband was killed during a tragic hunting accident when she was only twenty-eight. Although her husband forgave the man who killed him minutes before he died, Jane was very heartbroken and struggled with forgiveness for a long time. She took small steps daily, until she reached true forgiveness. She ended up loving the hunter so completely, that she became godmother to his child! If you ever struggle with forgiving someone, St. Jane is a wonderful saint to pray to for strength.

Saint Frances de Sales became Jane's spiritual director. She greatly desired to become a nun, but he convinced her to defer this until her responsibilities as a mother had been met. Eventually, with Frances de Sales' support Jane founded the Visitation order for women who were rejected by other orders due to advanced age, poor health, or being widowed. Soon after she underwent much suffering during a plague in France, as her children and St. Francis de Sales died, but she cared for the sick and continued to follow God's will for her life.

By the time Saint Jane Frances de Chantal died in 1641, at the age of 69, there were 86 convent houses in her order. When she died, St. Vincent de Paul saw her soul rise up, like a ball of fire, to heaven.

"Should you fall even fifty times a day, never on any account should that surprise or worry you. Instead, ever so gently set your heart back in the right direction and practice the opposite virtue, all the timespeaking words of love and trust to our Lord after you have committed a thousand faults, as much as if you had committed only one. Once we have humbled ourselves for the faults God allows us to become aware of in ourselves, we must forget them and go forward."- Saint Jane Frances de Chantal

Saint Jane Frances de Chantal, Pray for us!

St. Elizabeth of Hungary - A Real Princess

2011-03-14T21:04:00.000-07:00

While I was completely unformed when I chose my confirmation saint, and admittedly, just liked the name Elizabeth, God knew what He was doing when He sent St. Elizabeth of Hungary to be my patroness. I had no desire then to become a nurse, but 6 years later, when I decided I was going to apply to nursing school, and was looking up the patron saint of nurses, low and behold, there she was!

She has an inspiring story, as most saints do, and is particularly appealing to young girls, because she was a princess. She was betrothed at a young age and sent to live with her future in-laws to be raised alongside her future husband. He actually died before they were married, so she was married to his younger brother. She grew up a very pious child, as her husband's family was also very religious. They had a happy, holy marriage, and he very much supported her desire to serve the poor. It is said that he often held her hands while she prayed at his bedside. They had 3 children. She gave generously, and spent much of her time serving the poor, and ill. One year, while her husband was off fighting in a war, she built a 28 bed hospital to care for the sick, and fed 900 people daily.

Sadly, when she was only 20, 6 years after she was married, and 3 weeks after her 3rd child was born, she received the news that her husband had been killed in battle. She cried out, "The world with all its joys is now dead to me." While devastated, she remained faithful, and became a 3rd order of St. Francis. She continued to serve the poor, and as her children were sent to be raised by other family members (given some strain in the royal family), she devoted herself completely to the care of the sick. She died at the young age of just 24, and was canonized within 3 years of her death.

The thing that struck me most while reading her biography recently, was her uniformity with God's will, in her daily life, and her desire to be a saint. She was about little mortifications, faithful prayer, and detachment from material goods. This aided her in accepting great tragedies, and the smaller moments that didn't go her way. She also accepted the leadership of her husband and spiritual directors humbly. She had one spiritual director who was said the be so harsh, he would at times inflict physical penance, but he was the biggest propagator of her cause for canonization after her death, and said she had such a desire to grow in holiness. This struck me in particular because when the leaders in our lives are trying to lead us, our job is to ask ourselves, "Is what they're saying true?" Even if we don't like the way it feels, is it going to lead us to greater sanctity? St. Elizabeth of Hungary is one beautiful example of this humble love for Christ and fervor for sanctity.

For full bio, click here: St. Elizabeth of Hungary

Confirmation Saint-St. Victoria

2011-03-14T15:20:00.000-07:00

When choosing my confirmation saint I didn't really know what I was doing. I was going through RCIA and the deacon told my class to pick a saint....that was it. I didn't really know anything about saints so I borrowed a book of saints from a friend and found a saint name that I liked....St. Victoria.

St. Victoria lived in the 3rd century. She was engaged to marry pagan nobleman, Eugenius. Her sister, Anatolia, was also engaged to be married to Titus Anrelius but refused to marry him because she had experienced a vision where she was told "Virginity is an immense treasure of the King of kings." Victoria saw the example Anatolia showed of the spiritual advantages to consecrated virginity and broke her engagement to Eugenius in order to consecrate herself to God. Both girls were imprisoned and martyred for their faith by their suitors. One guard, seeing the girls' unfailing faith, was converted and martyred also. St. Victoria's feast day is December 23rd.

I am so happy to learn about these amazing women, their constant desire to serve our Lord and their sacrifice. I am hoping that this Lenten Season can be a time of sacrifice and prayer for me. There is not much known about St. Victoria but I am glad that I chose her for my confirmation saint and got to do the research on her for my post this week!

A Neat Guide for Lent

2011-03-11T08:15:00.001-08:00

GUIDE TO MAKING A SPIRITUALLY PROFITABLE LENT IN
PREPARATION FOR THE PROPER CELEBRATION OF EASTER
http://www.catholictradition.org/Passion/lent2.htm

The Lenten discipline consists of three separate parts:

1. Corporal or External Fast, including the abstinence from certain
foods, drinks, and amusements, i.e. music, and parties during Lent.

These points of fast should be stressed today especially with the
mania for entertainment besetting our society;

2. Spiritual or Internal Fast which consists of abstinence from all evil----sin.

Saint John Chrysostom taught that the "value of fasting consists not
so much in abstinence from food but rather in withdrawal from sinful
practices."

And Saint Basil the Great explains: "Turning away from all wickedness
means keeping our tongue in check, restraining our anger, suppressing
evil desires, and avoiding all gossiping and swearing. To abstain from
these things----herein lies the true value of fast!"

3. Spiritual Change achieved by the practice of virtues and good works
must be the main
objective of our fasting.

The Fathers of the Church insisted that during Lent the faithful
attend the Lenten church services and daily Mass.

In the course of the centuries, our fasting discipline has undergone
numerous and radical changes. Today, unfortunately, the observance of
Lent is but mere formalism, reduced to abstinence on certain days and
without any stress on one's spiritual growth or the amending of one's
life style.

It is urgent that we return to the pristine spirit of the Great Fast
which is so badly needed in our materialistic world.

Listed below are suggested practices that may be used along with your
usual Lenten family traditions of sacrifices and penances.

Corporal or External Practices:

* Take less of what you like and more of what you dislike at meals today.

* Take nothing to drink between meals.

* Do not use seasoning on your food today.

* Do not use any sweeteners with your food or drinks today.

* Avoid listening to the radio at all today.

* Take nothing to eat between meals today.

* Avoid any TV or videos; instead read the Passion of Christ in
your Bible or Missal.

* Take on!y one helping of each item at meals today.

* Say an extra Rosary.

Spiritual or Internal Fast Practices:

* Don't do any unnecessary talking; instead, say little aspirations

throughout the day.

* Exercise your patience today in all things.

* Don't make any complaints today.

* Restrain any anger, and go out of your way to be kind to the person
* who caused your anger.

* Don't be distracted with someone else's business.

* Avoid any gossip today. Instead say an extra Rosary to overcome
this great fault.

When asked to do something extra do so with a joyful and pleasant
attitude today.

* Speak in a pleasant tone to everyone today.

* Avoid using the phone today.

* Tell the truth in all your dealings today.

* Avoid any vanity or self-seeking today.

Spiritual Practices: [virtues and good works]

* Practice humility today in all your actions.

* Be generous today; help someone in need.

* Look for ways to be helpful throughout the day.

* Do a job that needs to be done without being asked.

* Be courageous; walk away from any impure situations today.

* Don't be at all idle today. Always be doing something for others
or for your spiritual growth.

* Go out of your way today to help or talk to someone who is
usually difficult.

* Volunteer for an extra job today.

* Say an extra Rosary today for the conversion of a sinner.

* Visit someone who is sick or lonesome today. Offer to say the
Rosary with them.

Starting next week... Six Weeks of Saints

2011-03-09T19:50:00.000-08:00

To bring inspiration to our daily lives during this season of Lent, we’ll be posting on Catholic saints over the next six weeks, starting next week.

Stop by on Monday, as we celebrate Six Weeks of Saints:

Week 1: Our Confirmation Saints and why we love them

Week 2: Favorite Female Saints who Define Beauty

Week 3: 20^th and 21^st century Saints

Week 4: Saints who have inspired us

Week 5: Inspirational Martyrs

Week 6: For Holy Week, Saints that played a part in the Passion

Have a wonderful Lent!

Individually Loved By God

2011-01-26T21:05:00.000-08:00

Recently when driving to work, or walking around a mall, or watching students file in and out of my classroom I have been struck with the idea that God loves each and every person individually. Every single person who has and ever will exist was willed into existence by God. He loves them individually and infinitely. He has a specific plan for their life. No matter where they are at in their relationship with God or what they have done in their life, God loves them as if there was no one else who ever existed. God doesn't just love us as one large group of people. He individually loves each of us. It is amazing to think that the complete stranger driving next to me in the car on the freeway has a purpose to help bring about God's plan of loving salvation that is their very own. With this thought I have found myself wanting to pray more and love those around me more. God sees so much goodness in them and I desire to have a glimpse of their goodness too.

Imitating Jesus

2011-01-26T15:19:00.000-08:00

A few nights ago I was bathing my toddler, when my mind began to wander. Overall, we truly enjoy bath time in our home. On this night however, my husband was working late, the house was a disaster, my son had been overtired and cranky all afternoon, and I was battling first-trimester nausea and (i'll admit it) a bit of boredom. As a result, I was daydreaming of all of the other things I would rather be doing at that moment...

This train of thought led me to Applejacs' recent post, which created a discussion between working and stay-at-home moms. I started to pray, "dear Lord, is this really where you want me right now? Is this the best use of the time and gifts you have given me?"

Almost immediately, as I poured water onto my sons' back, I was hit with the beautiful image of Jesus washing his apostles' feet. Jesus serving others, lovingly, willingly. Wow, was I quickly humbled!

Oftentimes, women feel that careers are a ladder to making a "real" difference in the world, or doing something most important and challenging. I think that when we truly search within ourselves and our current situation, however tedious it may seem, we find so many opportunities that Christ gives us to imitate Him, and to serve others, and to act out of love. My faith teaches me that nothing this world offers is more important than this.

Perhaps I wasn't saving the world that night in any big way, but with a little added love, I was suddenly helping to do Christ's work on earth.

Adoption as the First choice

2011-01-25T20:04:00.000-08:00

I was reading the co-sleeping article that applejacs posted. I have also read articles on the La Leche league website that explain the SIDS is increasing because children are not sleeping near their parents at night and therefore not able to mimic the parent's breathing patterns at night. Children need to learn how to breathe at night and if they are by the mother they will pick up on this pattern.

Anywho... at the bottom of the article I saw this link and as a couple that is currently considering adoption, I took a moment to browse it!
http://www.drmomma.org/2010/03/adoption-as-first-choice.html

I really appreciated that it reminded me that adoption is not just a "second choice" but rather an active choice in how to have children.

My husband's family adopted his oldest sibling and he's always been interested in the idea. I can't stand when people think we are "giving up" on having children of our own if we are considering adoption. Some people have said "what's the rush you haven't been trying that long!" My answer is - We want 8 kids, so at a year and a half with no kids, we've waited long enough in our opinion. Also, we want to give these children that don't have homes, a home. And just in case you were going to ask me what happens if we get pregnant while we are adopting (I also read that only happens in 5% of cases) we'll have 2 babies! I would never take a child into my home and then send him/her on their way because I got pregnant. Would you get rid of your first child if you got pregnant right away with another one? We would simply have our 2 of 8.

Peaceful Parenting

2011-01-24T21:10:00.000-08:00

Since I found out I was pregnant, I haven't stopped reading parenting books and articles, and listening to parenting advice. I know for all of us parents, we just want to get it right. Although it's not dogma, I have found, in what I've read, the attachment parenting model seems to most closely model the way I feel God the Father parents us, and very much the way I want Him to as well. There are many variations of this, and there's clearly no exact science to raising saints.

I just found this article to be very interesting, and very supportive of the way many serious Catholics parent their babies...

Sleep training: Higher Stress, Lower Seratonin may increase SIDS

My Parish

2011-01-21T11:56:00.000-08:00

Growing up, we went to a couple different parishes. The city was growing and so the number of Catholics grew, hence more parishes needed. I remember they all had different flavors and the people attending them seemed to have different attitudes about going to mass.

Sure, at every parish in the world, there are some people who will always be: Sits-in-the-front-and-leads-the-people-in-the-responses Guy, Prays-so-fervently-she-forgets-to-stand-up Lady, So-excited-about-the-sign-of-peace-your-hand-falls-off Man, Used-to-have-a-good-voice-200-years-ago Woman, and on and on.

Then there are the groups of people that tends to be always around: Teenagers or the "boo for Mass" people; young parents, the "Mass is so hectic" people; spouses of Catholics, or the "blah for Mass" people, most of the crowd fits into "attentive but easily distracted at Mass" people; and my personal favorite... old people, the "yay for Mass!" people.

Now - my parish is of all ages, but in some ways they all are like old people. You walk in and they are mostly very quiet before Mass. The church was constructed during the early 70's or, fan period, but has been redone to look gorgeous. Tabernacle in center, candles all around, Statues in nooks with painted angels and gold in-lay, they even have painted some of the walls to look like marble, but in the "marble" grain is tucked JMJ or IHS. So beautiful!

We had our newest baby baptized on the Feast of the Baptism of the Lord (nice day, huh?). It was the last day of the Christmas season, and there were trees and lights and candles and about 10 alters boys who knew exactly what they were doing (and more shockingly) looked like they actually wanted to be there and had chosen to assist at the Mass. It was just glorious. It was how Mass I think was meant to be. And at the height of the Sacrifice of the Mass, I looked up and the head alter boy was laying prostrate on the floor, very aware that his Lord had just died for him.

I love that our parish is made up of "yay for Mass" people. That one alter boy I would say is a "YAY FOR MASS" man.

Me? I'm hoping the "YAY" will wear off on me - I'm pretty sure it's already started.

Recipe Review - Bread Gnocchi

2011-01-15T14:54:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, on Food Network, I was watching a Rachael Ray episode on making a meal from what's already in your pantry. I don't usually go out of my way to catch her show, but having such an erratic work schedule, this was something I could hopefully learn from in order to make lunch time and dinner time easier for my husband and me.

She made bread gnocchi with leftover Italian bread and other pantry ingredients. It looked so delicious, I decided to try it out for my husband and me for the football game today. It took no more than fifteen minutes to make, and was absolutely delicious - like a doughy, soft, hearty pizza with fresh basil, tomatoes and mozzarella cheese. I added sliced roast beef under the mozzarella, since my husband doesn't believe that a meat-less free meal qualifies as an actual meal. I'll definitely make it again, especially since we now have basil growing on our balcony!

Try it out -

Rachael Ray's Bread Gnocchi with Tomato and Basil

Ingredients

8 slices day old, good quality Italian bread
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil, 3 turns of the pan
2 tablespoons butter, cut into pieces
4 cloves garlic, finely chopped
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 cups (2-ounce cans) tomato sauce
3 small plum tomatoes, seeded and chopped
Several fresh basil leaves, torn
2 cups shredded mozzarella, smoked mozzarella or provolone cheese

Directions

Preheat broiler.

Heat a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Chop bread into bite size pieces. Add extra-virgin olive oil, butter and garlic to the skillet. Melt butter into oil then add the bread. Season the bread with salt and pepper. Toss and cook the bread 7 to 8 minutes then add the tomato sauce and fresh tomatoes. Turn to coat and warm the tomato sauce, 3 to 4 minutes.

Remove the bread gnocchi and tomatoes from heat and transfer to a casserole dish, top with basil then cover the dish with cheese. Place the casserole under the broiler and cook 2 to 3 minutes, until the cheese browns and bubbles. Serve immediately.

PS. Since I don't understand the rules of football, I think I'll make dessert instead.

JPII WE LOVE YOU

2011-01-14T11:28:00.000-08:00

Great news for The Church...

http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/john-paul-iis-beatification-approved-for-may-1-divine-mercy-sunday/

2011-01-12T12:04:00.000-08:00

This is the very perfection of a man,

to find out his own imperfections.

–St. Augustine

Stand By Your Man

2011-01-11T11:57:00.000-08:00

We recently had a blog about the crisis in our culture today with real men being a rarity. I find this incredibly true, but am blessed to have a found one of those rare ones who is my protector, my prince, and our family's provider. However, I find myself, on a weekly, if not daily basis, fighting the urge towards my man from Genesis, to not be a nag. I find it incredibly difficult at times to be a supportive wife, and to always appreciate his sacrifice for our family.

My husband doesn't have a 9-5 job. He travels frequently, unexpectedly, may work weekends, evenings, and then there are days where he may leave the house at 10am and be home at 4pm. I knew this was how it was when I married him. Two weeks before our wedding he was in 17 different cities in 19 days. Yes, his job is slightly insane, but enough about that.

The bottom line is, I should not be complaining! I am able to be a mother to my children. I am the one that is there for the 1st words, 1st steps, to put a band aid on that 1st big boo boo. I may be exhausted at the end of the day, but how much more would I be if I had to go to work first and then scrape the bottom of my barrel of energy to try to give to my husband & children. I am confident that my husband would do whatever he had to, if it meant night shifts and picking up garbage to keep me at home, raising our children. Before I call him in the evenings, asking when he'll be home for dinner, if he'll be home, I need to pray a prayer of thanksgiving for the fact that I was able to cook a nutritious meal for our family with what my husband has provided for us.

We women who have found these rare, real men, who follow Our Father's command "to till the earth," need to recognize the gift our Lord has given us. We need to thank our husbands daily for their work, and support them in every way possible. I am writing this not just to remind anyone reading, but mostly because I need to remind myself. These men need us to be taking care of their children, keeping house, and giving them a joyful, warm place to retreat to because that will empower them all the more to go out and work the next day, and make them rush out the door to come home to us as soon as their job is done. Call me old fashioned, I am, but I think appreciating these manly men is one step to making men out of our boys.

Anyone have any tips on how to thank/appreciate one's husband and the work he does for the family? (I will also add that my husband served in the navy for a year and he attributes that training to the development of self-discipline in his life)

Saintly Wisdom

2011-01-11T08:00:00.000-08:00

"There is a certain simplicity of heart which is the perfection of all perfections. This is found when our soul fixes her glance solely upon God."

-St. Francis De Sales

The Best Doula Around

2011-01-10T19:48:00.000-08:00

For those of you for whom pregnancy is easy, you never cease to amaze me. Pregnancy is always wonderful (because it just is), but for most of us out there, it is TOUGH. Sacrifices come in all (strange) forms, from constant nausea, backaches, exhaustion, teenage-worthy skin breakouts, swollen bodies, insomnia, mood swings, the inability to poop... and the list goes on.

I have been feeling a little uncomfortable myself lately, and despite the joy I have about being entrusted with a new little soul, day-to-day living has been challenging. Through my first pregnancy, I was early on given the wise advice to turn to Mary. Mary went through a pregnancy, and she is our blessed mother. Of course it makes sense to ask her for help! She has an understanding of what we are going through.

I had a fantastic new thought occur to me this time around however. I was meditating on the mystery of the Visitation, when Mary (with child) visited Elizabeth, to serve her and help her through the end of her pregnancy. I was thinking about Elizabeth, who was past child-bearing age, and how difficult a pregnancy must have been for her, this late in life. Mary stayed with Elizabeth for 3 months to serve; probably helping her with housework, making meals, rubbing her swollen feet and trying to make Elizabeth feel more comfortable.

And so here is my epiphany: Mary took care of Elizabeth during her pregnancy! Why wouldn't she take care of all pregnant women?

Lately, I've been asking Mary to stay with me, like she did with Elizabeth. To come live in my home for these next months, and to help me to face my daily challenges. Not only did Mary go through it herself, but she also lovingly took care of her pregnant cousin. It goes without saying that Mary will lovingly care for any pregnant woman that turns to her.

WE ARE IN A CRISIS

2011-01-09T13:35:00.001-08:00

One of the other bloggers and I have had several discussions in which we both agree that our culture is facing a serious crisis of the loss of masculinity right now. Our discussion was spurred by Dr. Laura's recent comment that she thinks all men should have to go to boot camp because it teaches them discipline and strength. I think she might be on to something but I don't fully blame men for the way things are. Feminism was one of the worst thing that ever happened to women and to men. Let's be honest, feminism was not about the dignity of women it was about wanting to be men. Personally, I like being a woman and I like when men are real men. By demanding to be like men feminists somehow managed to emasculate men and convince them that they don't have to be real men themselves anymore. I think it is going to take the work of women to slowly turn things back around. I thought this blog might be a great place to start brainstorming together practical ideas as to how we can start encouraging men in our culture to be strong, brave, committed men again and undo the damage women before us inflicted.

Here is my first suggestion:
This is simple but I think it goes a long way. Women, let men make decisions when going out. When deciding where to eat dinner let them decide. This is one small way we can encourage them to be leaders. If they are good men they will pick a restaurant they know you like anyways so don't worry. Letting them lead in small matters will help build their confidence to lead in bigger matters as well.

Great Talks

2011-01-07T11:35:00.000-08:00

So - one beautiful baby and one crazy but fun Thanksgiving/Christmas Season later... I'm finally making time to write again.

Among many other New Year's Resolutions... I've trying to educate myself more in my faith. It's funny, because I've studied the faith a lot, A LOT A LOT (half a year on the interworkings of the Holy Trinity anybody?) and yet it's been hitting me how much I don't know. How much is known about our faith and has been studied... How much love people have poured into learning about our God, and His plan for us... Amazing. Tangent.

Anyway - my husband found a website that has really great talks about all kinds of subjects about the faith. I've listened to a couple of the talks, and recommend them highly.

Warning though: If you decide to download the talks (which they are totally ok with) it's a little funky, you have to right click, blah, blah, blah. Make sure to read the FAQs and it tells you how to do it.

But DO it. It's completely worth it.

Desires of the Heart

2010-12-31T16:43:00.000-08:00

I read something today that I thought worth sharing...

At times God gives us desires he never intends to fulfill. There is only one desire he will always fulfill and that is the desire to be with him in eternity if we obey his commandments. Temporal desires are not always fulfilled even if they come from God. Many young men want to be priests and they are unsuitable or lack the opportunity. Many woman want to be mothers but are sterile. These frustrated desires are meant to make us humble and more trusting in God. Ultimately being with him in eternity is all that matters. Maybe it is the unfulfilled desires that require a tremendous amount of faith that will be the very thing that ushers us into eternity with God.

A tough but beautiful truth.

Book Reccomendation

2010-12-30T11:41:00.000-08:00

I just finished reading the book Rediscovering Catholicism by Matthew Kelly. If you are looking for a book to help inspire you to more fully live out your Catholic faith in today's world I recommend this book. Maybe make a new years resolution to more fully embrace your faith and start by picking up this great book.

To All Brave Mothers

2010-12-28T14:23:00.000-08:00

"We would like to pay homage to all brave mothers who dedicate themselves to their own family without reserve, who suffer in giving birth to their children and who are ready to make any effort, to face any sacrifice, in order to pass on to them the best of themselves... How hard they have to fight against difficulties and danger! How frequently they are called to face genuine 'wolves' determined to snatch and scatter the flock! And these heroic mothers do not always find support in their surroundings. On the contrary, the cultural models frequently promoted and broadcast by the media do not encourage motherhood. In the name of progress and modernity, the values of fidelity, chastity, sacrifice, in which a host of Christian wives and mothers have distinguished themselves, are presented as obsolete. As a result, a woman who is determined to be consistent in her principles often feels deeply alone, alone in her love which she cannot betray, and to which she must remain faithful. Her guiding principle is Christ, who has revealed the love which the Father bestows on us. A woman who believes in Christ finds a powerful support precisely in this love that bears everything..."

-Pope John Paul II
On the beautification of St. Gianna Beretta Molla

The Cure for Writer's Block

2010-12-26T15:31:00.000-08:00

In the past several weeks I have occasionally sat down to "blog", but felt a strong case of writer's block. I stare at my screen, blank-faced and defeated. I feel annoyed for my lack of creativity and frustrated that the Holy Spirit is not inspiring me! I love Defining Beauty, and I have been disappointed for feeling like I have nothing to say...

I am not a writer, though I obviously enjoy pretending. I do remember however, some writing advice from a past English class. "If you have writer's block, just start writing". My teacher told us to start with a thought, a journal entry, or anything to help us get started. If that still did not work, she suggested we start copying the line "I do not know what to write..." until something came up. And most often, something eventually came up and I started to write.

Another area in life where I often get "writer's block" is prayer. Sometimes I feel discouraged that God is not listening, or I simply get so busy that I do not make time for prayer. I get in the habit of not praying, and suddenly, it is like I do not know where to start, and do not know what to pray about. It is like meeting an old acquaintance for coffee, and falling into an awkward silence because we just realized that we hardly know each other anymore. I fall into the trap of wondering whether God even wants to hear from me anymore!

I think that in this case, the best advice one could give would be to "just start praying". Turn off the distractions and close the door. Go to adoration. Don't know what to say? Use a prayer written by a saint, or somebody else. Go to mass. Say a rosary. Read a spiritual book. Just start praying! It may feel as though you are starting small, but it is a starting point, and most often, we eventually start to pray...

Now, hopefully this post will be just the muse I need to help me fight my case of writer's block.

Merry Christmas

2010-12-26T12:11:00.001-08:00

It has been quite some time since I have hit the blog screen. A bit of writers block and a lot of studying for grad school finals took control. A thought occurred to me on this beautiful Christmas morning that I thought I would share if anyone out there is still reading...

I love Advent! I love Christmas too of course but for some reason I really love advent. During some great spiritual direction on Christmas Eve I realized that I love Advent because it is a beautiful parallel for my own life. In my life God asks me to have a lot of patience. Patience seems to be a reoccurring theme in our relationship. I don't know about the rest of you but for me patience it not easy. We live in a culture of fast food and cell phones; a culture of convenience and instant gratification. If we want it we can usually get it with the click of a button or the plastic of a credit card. When it comes to the bigger things in life though, the things that are really important, we can't just order them up. If we want temporary happiness we can get it instantly but if we want lasting happiness we have to wait on the one who is the author and source of that joy. On the first Christmas, joy came to the world and from one little baby the rest of our fulfillment flowed. I long to be fulfilled and happy, not temporarily but forever. There are big questions in my life that remained unanswered. During Advent I am reminded that I can put those questions aside and fill my life with fading joy or I can embrace those questions and wait for the answers from the one who is the author of my soul and all its longings.

I love Advent because it calls me into deeper prayer and faith. In order to endure patiently we must pray for deep faith. Like the prophets of the Old Testament I must wait on the Lord. What joy they all must have felt at the moment of Christ's birth when all they had waited for had finally come!

JMJ

New Traditions

2010-12-06T16:37:00.000-08:00

My husband and I are very fond of traditions, given our Catholic faith, which is so rich in them. We applied it to our courtship with weekly rituals, (Monday gift days, Wednesday communication, Friday date nights), and now are growing with family traditions. The holidays are such a beautiful opportunity to create family traditions, and with each year, we're building more and more.

I thought this article was great food for thought for every Catholic family. I think we'll be adding this tradition this year. Other new ones we're taking on this Advent is celebrating the feast days during this time. We are celebrating St. Nicholas's feast and had our little girl set out one of her boots outside her bedroom last night, and this morning, she had a little gift of some new hair clips inside. It wasn't anything pricy or opulent, but her face lit up with surprise and excitement when she saw that her boot had been filled while she slept.

Another neat tradition we've started is a Jesse tree. I drew the stump and our 2 year old made leaves by fingerpainting green leaves, and each day, we add some magazine clipping or draw something signifying a moment or person in salvation history. For example, Creation- stars and moon, Noah- a picture of a ship, Passover- a lamb, David-a harp, The Visitation-an angel, The Nativity- a picture of a newborn baby, etc... It's a great way to teach little ones the various stories that lead to Jesus birth, and the salvation of the world.

Just a few ideas to keep the focus on the real reason for the season!

May God bless you and your families this advent. O Come, O Come, Emmanuel!

Preparing for Advent

2010-11-23T12:46:00.000-08:00

Just wanted to share that the Fisher Price Nativity Set is currently 50% off at Target! I have been considering purchasing it for a while, and now that it is on sale, I do not think I will be able to resist.

Does anyone have any other recommendations for toys, books, games, activities ect. to teach toddlers and young children about advent and the true meaning of Christmas?

Saintly Wisdom

2010-11-12T07:00:00.000-08:00

Nothing can bring greater happiness than doing God's will for the love of God.

-Blessed Miguel Pro

Me-Time

2010-11-11T08:00:00.000-08:00

For the past few years, my husband has been taking grad-school classes in the evening to earn his MBA. This means that on 2 or 3 evenings a week he often leaves his full work-day to head straight to school, on occasion dropping in at home for a quick bite to eat. Although this routine has been a challenge in many ways (especially since we've had a baby), I have also learned to see it as a blessing.

Although I love being with my husband, I am an introvert, and so I truly enjoy time to myself. I do not always have to be relaxing during this "me" time-- no matter what I am doing, I relish in the quietness and peace that comes to me when I am alone. Doing chores, groceries, folding laundry or catching up on work are all tasks that I am known to occupy myself with while my hubby is at school.

Once in awhile however, I love to indulge in a little special personal time. My favorite solitary things to do are to exercise, stretch, shop online, write and read. At the end of a really tough day, I might even pour myself a glass of wine, bake, or put in a DVD. Having this time to myself always helps me feel at peace and rejuvenated.

I'm curious: What are your favorite things to do when you have alone time? How do you schedule time for yourself when things get busy?

Through His Little Eyes

2010-11-10T21:01:00.000-08:00

I have often felt somewhat peeved by those who begin their celebration of Christmas too early. Nowadays stores shelves are stocked with candy canes amidst back-to-school supplies, Santa costumes are on display next to jack-o-lanterns, and the radio starts its Christmas programming before thanksgiving weekend. The main source of my frustration is that come December 26, everybody is so tired of carols and eggnog that Christmas trees are immediately put out for trash and the occasion is over. Don't they realize that the Christmas season is weeks long? For this reason, I try to hold off on Christmas-ing, and focus on preparations during advent...

Until this year, that is. It is still early November and I have already broken all of my rules. There is a Christmas CD in my car, and I have stopped to admire the decorated trees at the mall. My pantry is stocked with red and green candies for holiday baking, and I have already checked off a couple of items on my gift shopping list.

What has caused my insanity? I can put the blame entirely on the wonderful little person currently living under my roof.

Technically it is not his first Christmas. Last year we dressed up our little 8-month old in festive pajamas and drove around so he could see the lighted homes in our neighborhood. He learned how to unwrap gifts, and ate his first bite of honey-glazed ham. Somehow though, it is very different this year. And I can hardly wait for it all!

I cannot wait to teach him the words to the french carols I grew up with, and to sing happy birthday to Jesus. I cannot wait to see him play with our nativity set and let him decorate some sugar cookies. This year I can teach him about the individual decorations on our family's tree. We can wish others a Merry Christmas together, and snuggle in our jammies by the fireplace. I can wake him up on Christmas morning, give him a goody-filled stocking and share in his excitement-- the excitement I remember feeling as a child. This year, I can experience Christmas through his eyes as he soaks in the love and joy that envelops the world during this season. This year, the family traditions REALLY begin-- traditions that will hopefully continue for many more years.

So perhaps I am a little more anxious to get to December 25th than usual... But with advent only 2 weeks away, can you honestly blame me?

Thoughts from an "old" lady

2010-10-28T17:01:00.000-07:00

For the last few years I have been dreading turning 30. And I mean dreading. I would often tell people that on my thirtieth birthday I plan to stay in bed and cry, so don't bother me. I would get nervous to tell people that I was almost 30 because I am still single and felt that my life hadn't really started yet. I look very young so it was often very easy to avoid admitting my age. Also, I hear all these things people say about women turning 30...

- Your metabolism dies.

- Your fertility drastically takes a turn for the worse.

- Your hips spread.

- You lose your memory.

- Your hair starts to go grey.

and on and on and on

People make it sound like 30 is the end of life as you once knew it. Granted my metabolism has slowed and for the first time in my life I have hips. I am getting forgetful and have found a few grey hairs that were immediately pulled from my head. What was amazing to me though was that when I did turn 30 on October 24th, I didn't cry, frown, or even worry one bit. Instead one of my dearest friends through me a huge party and I celebrated life. I decided that as a present to myself I would buy some new clothes that make me feel especially beautiful and remind myself that 30 doesn't really matter. I decided that 30 would be an opportunity to start a new chapter in my life. I am giving myself permission to be beautiful. This whole first week of being 30 I have dressed up and allowed myself to be beautiful. This blog is called defining beauty and that is what I did for myself this week. I redefined for myself that I am beautiful. I am excited to be 30. Yes I do feel different but you know what, I feel better!

Note: I am the one in the middle in the picture above. You would never guess I am 30 right ;-)

I had it out with God today....

2010-10-25T20:31:00.000-07:00

So I'm in one of those times in my life where God has an amazing plan for me, as He always does, but I just don't like His timing. No I'm not promoting this attitude -I'm just admitting that there are moments in my faith where I let myself get in the way of the joy God has for me at every moment.

Sunday's reading was all about humility and I have struggled recently with the idea I had of what humility was - I thought it was being humiliated. I thought if I prayed for it, God would "teach me a lesson." I didn't feel like learning any more lessons for right now. Then I read this meditation that really brought new insight -it said that humility was just knowing God was always in charge and when I get in the way I am blocking the Lord working. It's that idea, I must decrease and He must increase.

Ok so today's argument - I'm not pregnant - I've been trying since I got married last June, but nothing... The first doctor I went ran some simple blood tests - diabetes, cholesterol etc and didn't have much to say when everything came back normal. He told me "it just takes time for some women to get pregnant." And so what do you suggest I do while I wait? "Just calm down." REALLY! Thanks for that great advice!

I'd taken NFP classes in marriage prep, but hadn't paid much attention - my husband and I want 8 kids - I didn't care too much about avoiding pregnancy or spacing pregnancy. People began to mention that maybe I should return to the classes - even my parish Priest. I finally listen end. My husband and I switched to the Creighton model and within the first class they were talking about issues I knew I had. After the class I went right up to the teacher and told her what I thought was going on with me. For the first time someone really listened - and she even made the comment - "well if that's it, that's fixable." I almost cried right there. Just to be affirmed, just to have a glimpse of hope in this grey period of struggles.

The Creighton class led to a visit with a wonderful NFP doctor who immediately put me on vitamins and ordered real blood work - like LH/FSH levels, progesterone, estrogen, vitamin D levels. I had to do blood work 3 different days - that was last Friday, Thursday and this Monday. I did see the doctor about 6 weeks ago but I had to wait until this week to do the blood work. I've been waiting for this week - here it and now I have bruises on my arm. There is a sense of hope that now the doctor can fix my hormone levels, if they can be fixed.

While I should be really looking forward to the test results, I'm just at a point where I'm feeling fed-up with all the vitamins and sinus medication and doctors appointments ... I thought I would just get married and have 8 kids. I know the Lord will grant us children - whether they are biologically ours or we adopt. We may be on the tip of getting pregnant or months away from adoption.

Sometimes I'm fine with all this, sometimes I really try to look at how I have to rely on the Lord and what good he's bringing out of this. I try to find the silver lining. And then there are days like today where I just want to give up, pout and cry. And so it leads me to the "having it out with God part."

I got frustrated on my commute this morning. Being nice and emotional I thought you know what God - I'm gonna give you a piece of my mind. (Please pray I drop this disrespectful attitude) And so I told Him I'd had it. I'm sick of waiting - I don't want to do anything, I just want to get pregnant and it's about time you fixed this. WHEW. I just didn't know where to go from there - how to take that next step with God....

Then I checked the mail. St. Padre Pio is my husband's favorite Saint - we got engaged on His feast day. In fact just last night we were telling our Confirmation students about novenas and Phil reminded me that he got what he asked for when he did the novena before he proposed - he said I got you. And so today in the mail I got an envelope from the Capuchin Franciscan Friars of New Jersey. I have no idea how they got my address. Inside was a prayer card with Padre Pio on the front. St. Pio is quoted on the card as saying "I want to be any a poor Friar who prays... Pray, hope and don't worry. Worry is useless. God is merciful and will hear our prayer... Prayer is the best weapon we have; it is the key to God's heart. You must speak to Jesus not only with your lips but with your heart. In fact on certain occasions you should speak to Him with only your heart." So Lord, what you're saying is Worry is useless. RIGHT! And then on the inside of the card is the Efficacious Novena to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. (My husband and I did our first Novena to the Sacred Heart and got married the day after that feast day.) The card says the novena was recited everyday by Padre Pio for all who asked for his prayers. There is also a prayer for St. Padre Pio's intercession.

And so I'll just conclude my thoughts with this... I had it out with Him today and He sent me a novena in the mail. Off I go to start my novena. I'll let you know the updates ...

Think Pink?

2010-10-23T15:02:00.000-07:00

Every October I always feel very conflicted about the Breast Cancer Awareness campaign. On one hand, cancer awareness and raising money for a cure is always important. Nevertheless, one of the largest organizations that contributing to breast cancer research to the Susan B. Komen foundation, who also happens to be a large supporter of Planned Parenthood. It is so frustrating that a group claiming to help women actually supports abortions and contraception. Don't they realize that oral contraceptives are one of the leading causes related to breast cancer?

I found this article especially interesting a helpful, in providing a Catholic perspective about the subject.

Thank you Lord for the time I have been given.

2010-10-22T10:59:00.001-07:00

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace;

where there is hatred, let me sow love;

where there is injury, pardon:

where there is doubt, faith;

where there is despair, hope

where there is darkness, light

where there is sadness, joy

O Divine Master,

grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;

to be understood, as to understand;

to be loved, as to love;

for it is in giving that we receive,

it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,

and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.

Amen.

Tenth Avenue North, Addison Road and Matt Maher

2010-10-20T19:22:00.000-07:00

So last night my husband surprised me with tickets to see Matt Maher with 10th Ave North and Addison Road. It was a wonderful concert! I am a huge fan of Matt Maher so I was so excited when we got to Fresno State and Phil said "look there is Matt Maher." WHAT!!! I didn't even know they were in town. The Matt Maher band and Addison Road opened for Tenth Ave North. I don't really know Addison Road or Tenth Ave North, but I did recognize a few songs from listening to Christian Radio. The concert was just such a motivating event and a call to come from the dark to the light - the tour is called The Light Meets the Dark. If they come to your town go see them!!!! Each band lifts up the audience and strives to make a difference in their lives! Christian concerts are so interesting to me, because they have the live music element while they are geared at helping the audience praise the Lord. So check out their tour dates - http://tenthavenuenorth.com/tour. I think they said they were leaving So Cal, but they're headed to Oregon so keep your eye out America - don't miss this concert!

Making Every Penny Count

2010-10-15T14:58:00.001-07:00

My husband and I use a household budget to keep track of what comes in financially, and especially of what comes out. One area that we really struggle with month after month, is our grocery budget. The causes for this constantly puzzles me. Although I admit that I do pick up an impulse buy once in awhile, we waste very little food overall. For a small family our size though, the numbers never seem to add up-- We are spending too much! For this reason, we decided that it was time to take try some new techniques that will hopefully make our grocery shopping more gentle on the wallet.

The first thing we have tried for this month is to create a Monthly Meal Plan. In the past I planned our weekday dinners for the week (weekends I just left up in the air since our routine varies). About a week before October 1st however, I printed a calendar online and started filling in the days with dinners and making my shopping list. I marked several days with "Leftovers" or "Take Out", and tried to consider our work schedules and any events we will be attending. Next, we made an enormous grocery trip for all of the ingredients we would need during the month. I still planned a weekly trip to the store to pick up any fresh produce needed, but mostly we stocked our freezer and our pantry, and bought as many bulk items as appropriate.

We are exactly halfway through the month, and things are going very well. The meal plan has been a blessing in many ways. It has reduced the stress of last-minute "whats for dinner?", and has also forced me to make less trips to the grocery store (thus reducing impulse buys). I am already planning on trying to choose meals according to items on sale next month, to try to save even more money.

The second technique that we are experimenting with is coupon-clipping. We decided to subscribe to the Sunday newspaper, and have started gathering coupons for items that we are likely to purchase. I also registered with a few products that I am loyal to (Pampers, Target), so that that they would send me coupons, or notify me about sales. I did not grow up in a family that uses coupons, and part of me still has doubts that $.50 off here and 1$ off there will make a big different, but I am willing to give it a try. I honestly hope to prove myself wrong!

I do not think that we will hit our budget goal exactly by the end of this month, but we are making improvements, and I think that with practice we will get there. I thought that it would be fun to share this adventure with other young adults learning the ropes of family life, and also ask-- What do you do to stretch your dollar? Any additional advice for young families?

Finding a Healthy Balance

2010-10-08T14:35:00.000-07:00

I was recently listening to a friend of mine describe a diet that she was following. You sign up with a company who provides you with all of your food and a meal plan to follow. You cannot deviate from the meal plan at all-- but you also do not have to think or worry about what to eat, and what not to eat. My friend was convinced that this was perfect for her, because she felt that she could not trust herself to make the right choices when it came to eating.

I think what surprised me the most was the rest of the women in the room's response to the idea of dieting. The majority of the group seemed to speak about dieting as though it were necessary, and a part of everyday life. These days there are hundreds and thousands of different diets out there, and hundreds of companies and books who make a profit in claiming to "help" you lose weight. Have you ever found it ironic that as the diet industry grows, so does our waistlines? More than ever, obesity is becoming a health issue in our country. I realize that there are many many factors involved, but I can't help but wonder if "dieting" is part of the problem.

As a teenager, I spent some time controlling my weight with VERY restrictive eating. I was able to sustain it for a few years, but eventually things started to spin out of control. I was on a starvation/binge cycle-- feeling more out of control than ever.

I often still struggle with my relationship with food, but I can promise you that at this time in my life, I do not use any form of self-control when it comes to food. I eat whatever I want, whenever I want. If I were to be completely honest, I would tell you that I have dessert after every meal, and often in between as well. I eat when I am hungry, and (most of the time) do not eat when I am not. And I am not fat-- in fact, I have never felt better.

By listening to my body's cues, I have been able to find a peaceful balance with food. God gave us food as fuel, but also for pleasure! There will be some days when I will eat a nutrient-dense salad, but there will be other days when I polish off an entire batch of brownies. There will be some days when I walk 7 miles, and others when I don't walk much further than the distance from my living room to my kitchen. There will be days when my skinny jeans will stay hung up in my closet, and days when I wear them comfortably. And hopefully, if I listen to what my body needs, on most days I will fall somewhere in between.

I have no doubt that my friend will lose some weight if she follows the diet appropriately. But what about afterward? I am willing to bet that a diet like this will never help you to feel better about your body. This is because most diets train its followers to ignore their bodies hunger cues. If we aren't listening to our bodies, how will we learn to identify our body's cues when we are full from eating? How will we know when our body needs food for energy, or perhaps a meal for comfort?

Beauty is not defined by fitting into a certain size of jeans. Beauty is about being the person who God made you to be. We need to trust that by listening to our bodies, we will find a healthy balance. And lastly, we should be praising Him that eating is enjoyable-- I can't imagine it any other way!

St. Vincent Pallotti Center!!!

2010-10-07T16:47:00.001-07:00

St Vincent Pallotti Center recently released an annual volunteer directory. The Connections 2011 shows volunteers information about over 75 programs to volunteer with. There is also a directory online where you can search around and find the program that you would want to volunteer with the most! The purpose of the St. Vincent Pallotti Center is to “inspire volunteers during their exploration of service through Catholic-based organizations.”

Volunteering is a huge part of the calling of any Christian. We are called to serve. Jesus was a servant. Even before He died, he washed the feet of His apostles. Service is a calling that each one of us must embrace. Finding a few places to volunteer at, like the ones in the Connections 2011 released by the St Vincent Pallotti Center, especially at a young age, can lead into life-long service projects. Finding a few specific organizations that can rely on your help allows for these organizations to continue to grow and help those who are in need.

Whether you feel most comfortable helping children, women in crisis pregnancies, those who are poor, those in prison, marriages, or any other group of people who are in need, all organizations rely on those who generously give of their time or money or prayer to help them reach the ever increasing need of those around us.

I challenge you to find at least one organization, then volunteer for them. Start out with once a month if you need to. Then challenge yourself to increase that time every few months. I guarantee you will find that helping others will give you meaning in your life. And you will continue to look at your challenges in life, and still find that you can find help when you need it, and you will be there for others when they are trying to overcome their own challenges!

Go to www.pallotticenter.org , and find a organization that you can help, right now!

2010-10-06T12:46:00.000-07:00

"It is here, my daughters, that love is to be found - not hidden away in corners but in the midst of occasions of sin. And believe me, although we may more often fail and commit small lapses, our gain will be incomparably the greater."

-St. Teresa of Avila

Mary's Mantle

2010-10-05T17:13:00.000-07:00

Today I was carrying my newborn baby boy in my sling, while visiting with some local Carmelite sisters, when Mother Superior gave me some interesting information. She said that when we speak of Mary's mantle, people usually think of her veil, but in her days, they were actually referring to the fabric carrier that she used to tote baby Jesus around. So when we ask her to wrap her mantle around us, we are actually asking her to carry us as she did baby Jesus,close to her heart. This was the spot that calmed baby Jesus because babyslings/carriersrecreate the womb keeping babies snuggled close to their mother's warmth, her beating heart, and moving with her. No wonder we ask Mary to wrap her mantle around us!

I am a fan of "wearing" one's baby not just because it promotes bonding, but also because it just makes everyday life much easier. In Mary's day, they didn't have fancy strollers or car-seats. They just had mom, and for a baby, there's nothing better than that. So if you're a mom, consider wrapping your baby in your mantle to make them feel at peace (and I promise it will likely bring you more), and Mother Mary, please wrap your mantle around us, your children.

Angels

2010-09-29T13:06:00.000-07:00

Today is the feast of the Holy Angels Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael. These are three very powerful forces of prayer and guidance for us. Michael means the protector, pray to him when you are in danger in body or soul (especially soul). Gabriel means God's strength. Ask for his help when you need strength especially if you are doubting your faith. Raphael means the healer. He is a powerful source of prayer when we need any kind of healing (physical, spiritual, emotional, etc.) God is so good in that he sends his angels to serve us and protect us. Realize today that all around you are God's angels. You are never alone.

Adoption/Like Dandelion Dust

2010-09-23T19:57:00.000-07:00

Taking in a child who needs a home and a family. What a beautiful thought.

I heard about a movie on Christian radio today - I don't know much about it other than they were promoting it and I watched the trailer. It looks like an interesting and sad film. If someone watches it, will you let us know...

http://www.likedandeliondust.com/'

"Pray, hope and don't worry."

2010-09-23T13:32:00.000-07:00

Padre Pio, pray for us.

AMEN

2010-09-18T20:42:00.001-07:00

Have you ever stopped to really think about what you mean when you say Amen? We say this simple word at the end of prayers, when we receive the Eucharist, or when we energetically agree with something but do we really know what we are saying? Most people probably think that Amen means something like "I believe" or "it is so." Really though the word Amen goes a lot deeper. Amen actually means to believe AND trust. Not only to trust but to trust fully. It is a trust that is complete. Think about that for a moment. When you say a prayer and end with amen, you are saying that you believe and trust. When the Eucharist is presented to you at Mass you say amen or I believe and trust. We are saying that we believe and trust that God will hear and answer our prayer and that we believe and trust that Jesus is really present in the Eucharist. Next time you say amen, don't let it just be a short passing word. Call to mind what you are really saying, that you believe and more importantly that you trust.
AMEN

Reel Love Challenge

2010-09-17T09:38:00.001-07:00

Marriage is a wonderful vocation that I have been blessed enough to embark on. After getting married in November 2009, my life has changed a lot! Because I am young, my marriage is often questioned. Even though at times getting married young can be difficult, it also has been a great blessing.

Through each difficult moment, I am not alone. I have my husband with me to get through any obstacle we come across.

Luckily, I recently graduated from college, but before being married meant that I needed to work a lot as well as go to school. Even though this often made me tired, being married to my wonderful husband enabled me to know that it was all for a purpose greater than myself.

In my opinion, marriage is a life long commitment. My husband and I vowed on our wedding day to love each other, for richer or poorer, sickness or health, until death. This is something we take very seriously. We talked long and hard about these vows way before we were even engaged. Marriage is not something we just jumped into, it is something we hold in high esteem. Marriage represents a love so strong that it is life-giving.

And as my husband and I have recently experienced, love is called to bring life. And that life we have created will have to be named. And as that life continues to grow in me, and our family continues to grow as our marriage continues, I cannot wait to find out all of the rest of life's ups and downs that we will go through together!

I always love to see film contests that allow college students and young adults to voice their opinion! I think it is important for everyone to become involved and get together to make such great projects!

I'm very excited to see a film contest like Reel Love Challenge because I think that life-long love is possible! Do you?

Check out this Commercial. (Click Here)

Then go visit their facebook page: ReelLoveChallenge

Mammogram Thursday!

2010-09-16T07:44:00.000-07:00

Hello Ladies!
I know people see the word Mammogram and get scared, but I'm here to talk about having one! My mother had cancer when she was 40. I've recently learned that the new tradition in medicine is that if a immediate family member, like your mother or sister has had Breast Cancer, then you are to begin Mammograms at least 10 years before the age they were when the cancer was found. So I started mine this year, the day after my 30th birthday! They had an appointment on my birthday, but I thought maybe I'd skip that barrel of laughs. Anyway I arrived for my Mammogram and it went very smoothly. The facility was so nice, I caught up on some magazine reading and Food Network while waiting. The procedure is quick and easy. A little uncomfortable for a second, but when are x-rays ever comfortable?

My point: please check early, check often, and check always! Be one less with Breast Cancer! Don't be scared of the X-Ray!
God Bless!

Amazon Mom

2010-09-15T15:00:00.001-07:00

Amazon started a brilliant new program called Amazon mom. You get 3 months of Amazon Prime for Free and for every qualifying $25 purchase you make in a baby store (which is pretty much everything) you earn an additional month of Amazon Prime. The best part is an additional 15% off subscribe and save for diapers and wipes which gives you a total of 30% off diapers!! For example, I use size 3s as backups for Gigi...normally on Amazon they cost $40 for a box of 204 size 3 Pampers. With the subscribe and save discount I signed up for delivery ever 6 months and my cost was $28. That's 13.7 cents a diaper (even cheaper than Kirkland...never saw that one coming) Anywho, baby food counts do, as well as baby soaps, potty learning supplies, wipes, etc. Enjoy!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/mom/signup/welcome

Guidance

2010-09-13T13:41:00.000-07:00

In college a dance professor gave me a copy of this anonymous poem. It has stuck with my, several years later. As I was printing it out this afternoon for my own dance students, I thought that it was worthwhile to share it with you too.

GUIDANCE

When I meditated on the word Guidance, I kept seeing “dance” at the end of the word. I remember reading that doing God’s will is a lot like dancing.

When two people try to lead, nothing feels right. The movement doesn’t flow with the music, and everything is quite uncomfortable and jerky.

When one person realizes that, and lets the other lead, both bodies begin to flow with the music.

One gives gentle cues, perhaps with a nudge to the back or by pressing lightly in one direction or another.

It’s as if two become one body, moving beautifully. The dance takes surrender, willingness, and attentiveness from one person and gentle guidance and skill from the other.

My eyes drew back to the word Guidance. When I saw “G: I thought of God, followed by “u” and “i”. “God, “u” and “i” dance.” God, you, and I dance.

As I lowered my head, I became willing to trust that I would get guidance about my life. Once again, I became willing to let God lead.

My prayer for you today is that God’s blessings and mercies be upon you on this day and everyday.

May you abide in God as God abides in you.

Dance together with God, trusting God to lead and to guide you through each season of your life.

"You changed my mourning into dancing…"
Ps 30:12

Psalm 95:7-8

2010-09-11T08:44:00.000-07:00

For this is our God, whose people we are, God's well-tended flock. Oh, that today you would hear his voice. Do not harden your hearts

Identity

2010-09-08T12:43:00.000-07:00

Every story in order to draw the listener or reader in, must have a good plot. We have all gone to a movie because it has big name actors or crazy effects only to find out that it has absolutely no story line and it is void of a real plot. Plot is to a story what identity is to an individual. Each person needs an identity. It is crucial to who we are. Where we find that identity is the challenge of today's culture. I work with teenagers as a morality teacher and I see more and more how much teenagers today are at a loss to really know who they are. They are searching for an identity, for their own story, and are turning to anything they can to try to establish one.

Take a trip back in time with me for a moment to reflect on how we got to be a culture of people struggling with identity. During the period of the enlightenment science and technology took off. Reason became the mantra of this period. People thought that everything could be solved through science. Pope Benedict XVI said of the Enlightenment "people believed they could regain paradise lost through science and technology. They moved their hope from Jesus to science." Deep inside us we long to get back to the the perfection that Adam and Eve experienced in the garden and in a way the enlightenment period thought they could get back there through science and technology. Society started seeing science as their savior instead of God. We lost a sense of the grand storymaker and with a loss of Him came a loss of the story itself. People then had to make up their own story.

Fast forward to the Baby Boomer generation. The baby boomers took this idea of creating your own story to an extreme. It was during this time that people started telling their kids "you can be anything you want to be." They lived during a time of great advancement and so they were dreaming big. They were giving them permission to write their own story. This might sound great and like something an "inspirational speaker" would say but in reality it isn't true. I couldn't be an NBA player. God just didn't make me a super tall, super athletic person. When we tell children that they basically make their own story and their own identity we are by default telling them that they have no identity until they create one themselves. Their worth then is self made. This is a terrible burden for someone to carry during their teenage years when their identity is most questioned. It is like sending them into a storm with no compass. The wind can push them any which way. Why is the generation after the baby boomers called generation X? Because they had no real identity. The generation after that is called generation Y, because well, that is what comes after X. Human beings need to know that they have an identity. That they have a story. Yes we are writing our own story through our life but we have the best co author possible, God himself. If we loose site of Him, the story becomes very confusing and tough to write. We don't need to make up our story or create our own identity. God has given us an identity as his child. Instead of telling kids they can be anything they want to be let's start giving them permission to be exactly who God made them to be!

College is...

2010-09-06T10:31:00.001-07:00

I have a new article up on IIBloom!!!

This article is dedicated to the AMAZING Class of 2010 and Professors from John Paul the Great Catholic University!!!!

College is...

Parental Rights

2010-09-05T18:18:00.000-07:00

My mother in law forwarded me an eye opening article about parental rights. Did you know that if your child is 12 years old you have NO legal rights to view their medical records?? Yup, your 12 year old who is 100% dependent on you for food, clothing, shelter, and allowance has the legal right to hide their medical records from you and can even go to the doctor to the doctor to be prescribed birth control (not sure if a pharmacy can fulfill that prescription though if they are under 18...) Yet another piece of legislation brought to you by pro-abortion groups to chip away at our parental rights. Don't you just love California?

Here's the article.

Pray for Priests

2010-09-01T09:06:00.001-07:00

I just found out yesterday that a Priest who I greatly admired has left his community and the Priesthood. This reminded me how much we need to pray for our Priests. The Devil hates them most because they bring us Jesus truly present in the Eucharist. We may often remember to pray for an increase in Priestly vocations but let us not forget to pray for those men who have already given their life to the Church has a Priest. Below is a prayer for Priest. Please keep in your prayers Fr. Xavier, Msgr Dale, and all Priests who have been led astray that they return to the their vocation like the Prodigal Son in scripture.

Prayer for Priests

Most gracious Heavenly Father,
We thank you for our faithful priests and bishops, whose spiritual fatherhood and example of fidelity, self-sacrifice, and devotion is so vital to the faith of your people.
May our spiritual fathers be guided by the examples of Saints Peter and Paul, all the Apostles and their saintly successors. Give them valiant faith in the face of confusion and conflict, hope in time of trouble and sorrow, and steadfast love for you, for their families, and for all your people throughout the world. May the light of your Truth shine through their lives and their good works.
Assist all spiritual fathers, that through your Grace they may steadily grow in holiness and in knowledge and understanding of your Truth. May they generously impart this knowledge to those who rely on them.
Through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Z is for... Zeal

2010-08-31T16:28:00.000-07:00

Zeal, according to St. Thomas, "(From delos, a derivative of deo 'to boil', to 'throb with heat'), is 'a necessary effect of love', being 'the vehement movement of one who loves to [secure] the object of his love' (vehemens motus amantis in rem amatam, St. Thomas, Summa Theol. I-II:28:4)." When used most properly to its design (as our life's purpose is to know and to love God), zeal is the burning in our hearts for the knowledge and love of God.

I was driving last week listening to Matt Maher's, "Everything You've Done," per my daughter's request for "songs for Jesus," in which he calls us to "Dance for the Lord." This is our favorite part of the song. When I am most joyful, I am dancing and singing as if no one is watching, so the idea of doing this for the Lord, as David did before the Ark of the Covenant, stirs the fire of love for God in my soul. Perhaps this is also attributed to the fact that my reversion to the faith happened within Life Teen youth ministry. The organization has undergone some attacks in recent years with Msgr. Dale sadly falling away from the Church, but has always stayed Eucharist centered and in line with Catholic teaching. I can't deny the fruits in my own life. In fact, this blog was created as an extension of that ministry as most of us bloggers met there.

Nowadays, my faith has matured as I've grown in formation, and I hope that my zeal grows as my knowledge of Christ does. I am inspired by the silence I find in adoration with gregorian chant at St. Michael's Abbey, and by the unchanged beauty of the Tridintine mass, as well as by spiritual reading, and big or small experiences in my life. As women, I think we are particularly prone to growth from experiences in our lives. We tend to reflect and ponder more than men. While my husband may be on fire for sharing the truth of Christ after reading a chapter of a C.S. Lewis book, my heart is more often stirred by a person I encounter who is in need of the love or truth of Christ, something I may witness during the day, or simply by listening to the lyrics of a beautiful song praising God.

Whatever it is that brings out your zeal for the Lord, pay attention to it. Make sure to keep that as part of your regular routine and prayer life. We have an entire book in the Bible of songs written for Christ, and these are now daily Catholic prayers in the Liturgy of the Hours. Just don't forget to reignite that flame in your heart which burns for God. That initial fire that was sparked by my initial Catholic formation, amidst lots of praise and worship and friendships that lead me closer to Christ, should only be furthered as I grow in formation and virtue. It is that zeal for Christ that brought St. Paul to continue writing while in prison, that gave so many saints the strength to praise the Lord, even as they were being martyred.

A great, short commentary on zeal can be found at New Advent Catholic Encyclopedia.

Y is for Your wife is Hot

2010-08-30T17:08:00.000-07:00

While driving on the freeway a billboard caught my eye. "Your wife is hot." What?!

But it got me thinking. What adjectives are used to describe women? What do young girls strive to be? Sadly, I think "hot" is the most sought after status by teenage and young girls. Hot. What is hot? The closest definition I found in the dictionary was "lustful, amorous, or erotic" Girls, is that really all we want to be? Is that how we really want men to view us? How do you think they treat someone who's goal is to be lustful or erotic."

Instead I offer you a challenge: be BEAUTIFUL! You are created in the image and likeness of the Lord and your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit! be BEAUTIFUL! You were created that way!

Oh, and the billboard turned out to be unfinished. Next time I drove by it said "Your wife is hot." Call such and such air conditioning company.

X is for the Cross

2010-08-29T16:18:00.001-07:00

I was told once by a priest that the Church does not approve of pictures where Mary is not standing at the foot of the cross. She is not supposed to be swooning or lying crying on the floor, but standing - grieving and loving her Son.

I thought this was beautiful, the Church holding Mary in such high respect that she does not want people to see Mary as weak. And I think it tells us something about the Church's stance towards women in general. They are not weak humans who need to be shielded for all pain, but strong and loving who give their love and strength to others - there when many others are too scared to be.

X is for eXercise

2010-08-28T21:59:00.000-07:00

I find that when I exercise I feel a lot better physically, mentally, and spiritually. God made us with a body and a spirit and we need to take care of both. Most important of course is the spirit but we should never neglect the importance of the body because it is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Women can become obsessive about exercise, usually due to vanity, so it is important to have balance. Still though, don't let life keep you from taking care of your body. Dr. Laura often tells her callers who are struggling with feeling down or depressed to start eating well and exercising to help them feel better. I hear her give this advice a lot to mothers who say they are struggling with the challenges of motherhood. It is easy to cut exercise out because we are short on time and don't see it as necessary. I think we need to start seeing it as necessary though because as regards our health is really is a necessity. I have heard that 30 minutes a day 3-4 times a week is sufficient to keep us healthy. This week I start school both as a teacher and as a graduate student. I am going to try to commit to exercising at least 30 minutes 3 days a week this school year. I will likely be tempted to cut it out when I am busy but in the long run I know that exercising will be better for me both physically and mentally.

A Movie Recommendation

2010-08-28T12:07:00.000-07:00

I just watched The Prize Winner of Defiance Ohio. I've seen it before and enjoyed it, which is why I rented it from the library. It's a great story about a strong woman who uses her writing talents to make ends meet for her big family. She is positive and persistent through the whole film and a great image of a "proper" woman. Plus her 1940's/1950's dresses are fun to see! It was made in 2004 so check the library and NetFlix! "She raised her kids on 25 words or less!"

W is for Work and Witness

2010-08-27T19:37:00.000-07:00

Wow, did I wake up exhausted this morning! I just finished coaching a high school dance team through their "work week", as they prepare for school to start. This meant that my typical two-hour workday grew to almost a full-day of time clocked-in. Sixteen months ago I would not have batted an eyelash at the concept, but adding motherhood to the equation brings it to an entirely new level. To the working moms out there, I don't know how you do it!

I have felt specifically called to part-time work. Although my employment started out as a financial necessity, it has turned into something much more than an extra paycheck. Through teaching dance, I have found an creative outlet to share my love of the art and fitness, without sacrificing my primary duties of marriage and motherhood. In some ways, I feel as though spending those hours each week away from my home rejuvenates me, brings me joy, and helps motivate me to always give my vocation my all. I have spent many hours listening to music or working on choreography while doing laundry or housekeeping-- thus bringing enjoyment to some of my less exciting responsibilities.

More than this, I have also discovered my ability to use my talents to witness to those people around me. In some environments that many not be the most naturally Christian, I have the opportunity to spread the love of Jesus. This can be through love and support, mentorships with younger girls, and the example I pray to lead in the way I live my life. In addition, by sharing my knowledge of dance, I truly believe that I can provide a healthy outlet and passion to the lives of many young people.

I recently came across an excerpt from John Paul II's "On the Dignity of Women" that struck a chord with me:

"The hour is coming, in fact has come, when the vocation of women is being acknowledged in its fullness, the hour in which women acquire in the world an influence, an effect, and a power never hitherto achieved. That is why, at this moment when the human race is undergoing so deep a transformation, women imbued with a spirit of the Gospel can do so much to aid humanity in not falling."

This quote truly illustrates our situation and calling as women of God in our present day! Andi described in her recent post the many hats that mothers wear. Similarly, many women are being called to share their talents and gifts in the workplace. God calls us where he needs us, and there is no doubt that He needs strong women in working environments as well.

My marriage and family is always my first priority, above work. I am the only wife my husband has, and the only mother my toddler has. At this time I have been called to full-time motherhood, my mom was "at-home", and honestly, I totally get it. There is nothing wrong in simply being a wife or mother. In fact, it is beautiful!

At the same time, I do not believe that this means that a moms cannot aspire to a career, hobby, education or that "something more". I have met women who work full-time from home, have their own business, or who balance family responsibilities between both parents. Many moms take their "free time" to volunteer in the community, take on-line classes, or start creative projects at home, like scrapbooking, photography or sewing. Like JPII stated, by acknowledging our vocation to its fullness, we as women will be able to change the world, whether it is in our home, or outside in a larger community.

W is for Wedding Gowns

2010-08-27T09:00:00.000-07:00

I got my wedding gown ten days after I got engaged to my husband. I was home in Canada for Christmas and on a whim, my mother and sisters and I went to a small bridal shop in a small town called Elmira, Ontario (about ten minutes from where Mom lives) "just to take a look".

My perception of what my wedding gown was going to look like definitely changed over the years. I remember being really young and wanting something similar to my First Communion dress, which was a simple, cotton "little girl" dress along with thick, white tights and white shoes. Throughout my youth, teenage years and early twenties, that design changed often and I wondered with anticipation what it'd actually end up looking like.

When I was in the bridal shop, it was a wonderful experience. The seamstress went above and beyond to help me find something that I'd like, even if I didn't end up buying that day. It was so special to be able to share the browsing with my mother and sisters - especially since that now we all live so far away from each other; we were able to be together for what would be the most beautiful day of my life. They knew my taste and they helped me pick about five or six gowns to try on.

The first dress was... okay. It didn't really fit me well and I didn't like it on me that much. The second dress was awful. It was such a gorgeous gown but ended up looking like a big box on me. I remember being in the dressing room a little sad after that, wondering if I'd ever try on something that I'd end up liking. Where was I going to find my dress?

I put the third gown on and walked out. I lifted the skirt carefully so as not to trip over it when I climbed up on to the platform in front of the mirrors. My mother had a huge smile on my face and my sisters nodded in approval. It was a lacy, off-white, A-line gown that had a beautiful champagne ribbon under the bust with a bow. There was another bow at the back of the gown, near where my knees were to give it a slight mermaid feel. It was perfect.

Of course, it needed to be altered significantly. It didn't fit me perfectly, but I'm not sure many wedding gowns initially do. I wasn't a fan of the spaghetti straps on the gown - I asked for cap sleeves instead, knowing that my future husband wasn't a fan of strapless. My final fitting was the following July, when I went back to Canada for a friend's wedding. It fit perfectly, the cap sleeves ended up looking fabulous and I was overjoyed to finally put on the gown that I'd been dreaming about my entire life for my special day.

(Oh, and my veil? I made it myself, using tulle and some fantastic lace I found downtown Los Angeles. Turns out that mantillas are super easy to make - and absolutely gorgeous!)

V for Value

2010-08-26T20:44:00.000-07:00

The success of love is in the loving - it is not in the result of loving. Of course it is natural in love to want the best for the other person, but whether it turns out that way or not does not determine the value of what we have done.
Mother Teresa

Ladies - Let's practice the loving - no matter the cost or result!

U is for Understanding

2010-08-25T16:38:00.000-07:00

We often hear the saying "seek to understand before seeking to be understood." I think women have an innate ability to understand others. Maybe it is because we are made to be mother and will have to understand our children, but we have an ability to understand where someone is coming from or empathize with them. I think it is one of our great gifts at women. When we seek to understand someone we make them feel loved, accepted, and cared for. This is especially important when we are talking about matters of faith and helping to lead someone to conversion. Sometimes we can get so caught up in what we want to change about the person that we forget to first understand who they are and where they are coming from. We sometimes forget to just love them and that in that love God will bring conversion. Father Dave Pivonka, T.O.R. describes an experience like this in his book "Hiking the Camino." Father Pivonka walked the 500 miles of the Camino de Santiago in Spain in thanksgiving for the gift of his priesthood. Along the way he met a woman named Mara. Mara had a lot of pain in her life and was in need of conversion. Father Dave writes of his time with her:

"My time with Mara made it clear to me that I was not supposed to try to convince her of something or of some way of believing. Sometimes I think that, rather than really trying to know another person, especially one very different from myself, I can't get past my agenda of what I want to happen. I want the person to change so badly that I fail to recognize the beauty of the person. Jesus didn't treat people like this. Throughout my entire time with Mara, I felt God asking me to walk with her and be present to her. In the end God was calling me to love."

We need to speak the truth and seek to bring others to conversion but we should never forget to first love and try to understand them.

T is for Tangentially Appropriate

2010-08-24T14:40:00.000-07:00

I have said that God is pleased with nothing but love; but before I explain this, it will be as well to set forth the grounds on which the assertion rests. All our works, and all our labours, how grand soever they may be, are nothing in the sight of God, for we can give Him nothing, neither can we by them fulfill His desire, which is the growth of our soul. As to Himself He desires nothing of this, for He has need of nothing, and so, if He is pleased with anything it is with the growth of the soul; and as there is no way in which the soul can grow but in becoming in a manner equal to Him, for this reason only is He pleased with our love. It is the property of love to place him who loves on an equality with the object of his love. Hence the soul, because of its perfect love, is called the bride of the Son of God, which signifies equality with Him. In this equality and friendship all things are common, as the Bridegroom Himself said to His disciples: I have called you friends, because all things, whatsoever I have heard of my Father, I have made known to you.

-St. John of the Cross