“Most of us love a non-self, or something extrinsic and apart from our inner life; but a mother's love during the time she is a flesh-and-blood ciborium is not for a non-self but for one that is her very self, a perfect example of charity and love which hardly perceives a separation. Motherhood then becomes a kind of priesthood. She brings God to man by preparing the flesh in which the soul will be implanted; she brings man to God in offering the child back again to the Creator.”
 

Fulton J. Sheen, Life Is Worth Living

One door closes, another opens...

After listing our condo for over three months without any offers or leads, we've decided to stay put. Our plan is to save up for a down payment and pay down our current loan, so that we could hopefully be ready to move in 1.5 to 2 years.

Although I was surprised that our beautiful little home did not sell, this was one of those experiences were God clearly gave us a red light. We did our part-- made the upgrades, kept things tidy, escaped for the many ( many) showings. We submitted our offer on our desired home and sent in all of the paperwork that was needed. Our plan to move was in His hands and the outcome was definitely out of our control.

There is something very peaceful about events where God clearly opens or closes the door. The situation sets us up to trust in His plan.

On the other hand, there are many areas of my life that would be much simpler if I could just let go. Yet, for some reason I resist him, often kicking and screaming at the same time. I make life more complicated. Dominic skips his nap and I turn into a grouch. Gabriel wakes up every hour and I let it out on My husband or a friend. I forget that all these small everyday occurrences are also from God, and thus need to be accepted peacefully. (and yes, if you haven't noticed, a lot of my frustration is rooted in my children's inability to sleep). Sometimes it is because my will is not uniform with His, but more often it is because I fail to trust. He knows what is best!

I love lent because it truly is a season to simplify things. It is like a spiritual, mental and physical housecleaning that helps me to focus on what is important. It is time to get rid of that clutter that complicates my life, and put the nitty gritty of my days entirely in his hands. Maybe things won't be as crystal clear as a house sale, job offer, or new baby. But every minute brings an opportunity to grow in grace by accepting our situation, or fighting it. And perhaps one day I will learn to let it be.