Detachment Parenting

I find myself and a lot of the moms I know going through all kinds of hoops (and guilt) trying to raise their kids "just right." And obviously, we should try to fulfill this awesome responsibility to the best we can, but we need to also remember that our children are first children of God's, with their own soul, own free will, and own path to take to Him.

A mom this beautiful article on her own parenting experience. A quote I really liked is "In the end, our children were created to fulfill not our own will but God's".

http://www.insidecatholic.com/feature/detachment-parenting-learning-to-let-go.html

A Family that Plays Together

Things are a little hectic around here because my husband and I are packing up for a week-long summer vacation.  The past couple of years we have been fortunate enough to have excuses to vacation to beautiful tropical destinations.  If we didn't have the means to travel to a resort however, we would still make an effort to "vacation" together,  even if it meant planning activities in our area, having some relation time by our community pool, or visiting friends with homes at which we could stay.

We often hear that the family that prays together stays together, but we must also always remember to play together! If you think back on your childhood, it is likely that a lot of your fondest memories were probably some family vacations.  Whether it was a stay at a 5-star resort or a 10-hour road trip to your cousin's wedding, it was valuable time spent with the family God gave you.  Over the years we still find ourselves looking back on photo albums, watching family video footage and laughing about the things that went right (and wrong) during our holidays. 

When my husband and I were preparing for marriage, we had an honest discussion about the importance of making memories as a family throughout our lives.  We vowed that we would try to focus on saving fun money for annual trips, pilgrimages and family activities, rather than spending it on material possessions.  As Catholics we are reminded that when we die, we cannot bring our cars, boats and flat screens with us to heaven.  Time enjoyed with family and friends however, shape our experiences, who we are, and who we will become.

Dose of Humility

I don't know about you, but my sins have a way of coming back around and biting me in the bum. This could be related to my husband, who doesn't really let me get away with anything. He takes his job of leading me to Heaven quite seriously. Or it could just be God's way of teaching me the effects of my sin.

Recently, I offended someone close to me because of a selfish tendency I have. I didn't anticipate it hurting them to the extent that it did, when I acted, but my action was definitely rooted in vice and a lack of charity. The toughest part of this, was that even when I apologized and tried to make amends with a gracious act the next day, the person did not forgive me. They, in fact, would not speak to me. Now regardless of whether their actions were just or not, I was still the one in the wrong. No matter how it made me feel to have my apology rejected, it was all a result of my sin. I could not look at the other person's faults, only mine. This really perplexed me, and I didn't really know how to proceed.

When someone doesn't accept a first apology, do you just continue apologizing and trying to make peace, or do you just let the relationship remain disconnected?

In this circumstance, I prayed a lot, and was struck by the near death of a friend of mine (please keep Melanie, a young mother in critical condition after delivering her 2nd child, in your prayers), and resolved that I would not allow the tension to persist, because life is too short. I further humbled myself before this person and took further steps to beg their forgiveness. I accepted 100% responsibility for my failings, because even if I didn't realized how much it would offend them, it did hurt them, and my action was rooted in vice.

When we sin, we must humble ourselves. We must look at our failures and take responsibility for them. This includes taking all measures possible to repair the damage done, whether it be private penance, or gestures to make a mends with a person that our sins have harmed. Their actions are not up to us, but we must make sure that we do everything within our power to admit our faults and make reparations for them. I am thankful for God's mercy and the forgiveness of the person I offended. It took more than I thought it would to obtain, but I have received it, and am humbled to realize that our sins do have incalculable effects, and I desperately need mercy. Praise God for the gift of confession as well, because even when our human brothers and sisters aren't forgiving, God's mercy is endless!

A beautiful, simple prayer that I try to say frequently, is, "Jesus Christ, son of the living God, have mercy upon me, a sinner."

Art Suplies

I just wanted to remind everyone about the great back-to-school sales on school supplies! Office Max has bags of pens, pencil and rulers for 10 cents. Target has crayons and colored pencils for 20 cents and folders for 15 cents. I saw glue bottles for like a quarter .... Now is the time to stock up for art stuff for the little ones! I admit I bought a box of crayons for myself and I want to go back for some glue! I bought supplies for our church fundraiser - I got 3 bags of 10 pens and 2 boxes of 10 pencils each for 10 cents. At their normal prices it would have been $5.50 and it only cost me 50 cents! I saved a whole $5, now there is a bargain!!!

Catholic Communion

This afternoon at Mass, I had to once again chase someone down who took the Eucharist but did not consume it. If you are not Catholic, God loves you infinitely but it is an important aspect of the Catholic Church that only practicing Catholics receive communion. This is different from many protestant churches where everyone is allowed to receive communion. By receive I mean that you must consume the Eucharist and not take Jesus on a field trip back to your seat, causing me to have to chase you down to consume Jesus for you. If you are a practicing Catholic please consume Jesus immediately and not back at your seat. If you are an extraordinary minister of the Eucharist please be aware that everyone who receives communion in the hand actually consumes the Eucharist. In more than one occasion I've had to follow someone and ask for Jesus back. I hope this helps clear up any confusion. I told the Priest after Mass and he said that at the Vatican they have huge problems with this because people want to take home the Eucharist as a souvenir. Jesus is hanging out in scrapbooks all over the world?? Oh boy!! My heart can't handle much more!!

Mary Mother of the Eucharist, please continue to protect and guard your son as you did when he was a little baby in your loving arms.

Self Esteem

One thing a lot of girls struggle with is low self esteem. We are so busy comparing ourselves to others that we fail to recognize our own gifts and talents. It occurred to me in prayer a few days ago that lacking self esteem is not only an offense against ourselves but also an offense against God. God does not make mistakes and he made us just how he wants us. Our true worth and value come from the fact that we are made uniquely special in God's image and likeness. Our worth comes from His love for us. When we fail to recognize our worth we are suggesting that God screwed up or that he is mistaken in loving us. It is up to us to fight the temptation to devalue ourselves because to our maker we are absolutely worthy of all love (sin aside).

And don't be afraid to be proud of the gifts and talents God has given you. Saint Therese is a perfect example of true humility. She said, "a flower would not say that it stinks." Humility is being completely honest; not boastful, because the credit from our goodness belongs to God, but honest and unafraid of who God has made us to be. On her death bed Therese told her sisters that they were taking care of a Saint. She was absolutely right!

A is for August

Visit Defining Beauty throughout the month of August for

.:the ABC's of femininity:.

Happy Natural Family Planning Awareness Week!

"The dates of Natural Family Planning Awareness Week highlight the anniversary of the papal encyclical Humanae Vitae (July 25) which articulates Catholic beliefs about human sexuality, conjugal love and responsible parenthood. The dates also mark the feast of Saints Joachim and Anne (July 26), the parents of the Blessed Mother." From the USCCB website.

How cool is it that there is a week dedicated to NFP?! Check your local diocese website to see if they have any events or workshops :)

And I challenge us all to say a prayer for all couples considering using NFP and for those who use it to share their stories and knowledge with as many people as possible!

Only Love Creates

God therefore called man into existence, committing to him the craftsman's task.  Through his "artistic creativity" man appears more than ever "in the image of God", and he accomplishes this task above all in shaping the wondrous "material" of his own humanity and then exercising creative dominion over the universe which surrounds him.  With loving regard, the divine Artist passes on to the human artist a spark of his own surpassing wisdom, calling him to share in his creative power.

 - Pope John Paul II

I adore this quote about art and creativity.   In the past few weeks I have taken great pleasure in  choreographing a routine for my dance team.  I find myself driving home from rehearsals feeling especially satisfied with my work.  Call me crazy, but I have even lost some sleep due to my excitement about movement phrase ideas and counts.

We learn early in our lives that God is creative.  Children pray to God in thanksgiving for rainbows, lakes, puppies, ice cream and other wonderful creations that we can't image our world without.   Being made in God's image and likeness means that creativity and innovation is a deeply-rooted part of who we are.  This shines through the choreographer who busies himself by making dances, the artist staring at an empty canvas, or the co-creative parents who find joy in watching their child grow.  Creativity is written into our bodies, our minds and our souls. With our creativity we use our talents and gifts to make beauty and to glorify God.

It is amazing to me how easily art can be viewed as frivolous or trivial.  Are we not constantly hearing about art education programs being cut?  Did you know that creativity helps to develop an entire half of our brain?  This does not seem unimportant to me at all.  While majoring in dance during college, I was consistently asked what I would accomplish with an arts degree.  I was encouraged (and responsibily went along with the idea of) studying for an additional degree to exercise the left-side of my brain with a more rational or "realistic" major.  In fact, part of me truly believed that one day I would have to eventually part with my inner-artist to "grow up".  Several years after graduation however, I am discovering how important this aspect of my life and personality will always be.

Being creative does not only mean being a musician, a sculptor or a designer. Nor do you have to blow your budget for art supplies at Michael's. I discover my inner-artist when I bake, decorate my space, choose my outfit, play with my baby, photograph memories and even blog online!  Pursing these God-given interests and talents help me escape the ordinary day's routine, build confidence and find self-accomplishment in my life.  And did I mention that it is fun? 

Our divine artist calls us to share in His creative power.  St. Maximillian Kolbe quoted that "Only Love Creates".   Therefore, by using our gifts we can only reflect His love and goodness.  We literally make our lives and our world more beautiful and more like-God!  What is so frivolous about that?

Now it's your turn-- how do you express your artistic gifts?

40 Days and Nights for our Nation

Some of you may watch Glenn Beck already and be familiar with his call to pray and fast for 40 days and nights for our nation, but if not, I highly encourage you to check out his pledge. I recently started watching his show with my hubby, and while he isn't Catholic (yet; I really think he will be someday), he is quite inspiring and informative when it comes to national and world issues. He is not afraid to tell Americans that we must pray for our nation, remain faithful to God and to Christian ethics, and to call us to action.

Recently, some scary things have continued to happen in our country. The "Black Panthers" have been speaking out about how they think even "white babies need to die." The U.S. Dept. of Justice has just dropped a case against them for harrassment outside of a polling place, threatening people with clubs and other weapons, if they didn't vote for Obama. Their mindset comes from people like Jeremiah Wright, and others who our president names as his biggest influences. President Obama himself signed an executive order, giving himself the right to assassinate any American citizen that he sees as a terrorist threat. Seeing as how Congress and the Senate have let every other item on his liberal, communist agenda pass, I'm guessing they won't be stopping this one. It's a shame, but our country really has strayed from the ideals of our founding fathers.

In an attempt to fire up Americans to return to our roots, and celebrate the personal virtues of those who've fought honorable for our country, there will be a rally, on August 28, at the steps of the Lincoln Memorial in Washington D.C. to begin "Restoring Honor" in America. These are the very steps where Martin Luther King spoke about true liberty and charity. Glenn Beck will be speaking there along with others, including Sarah Palin.

During the next 40 days and 40 nights, leading up to the event, Glenn is urging Americans to join him in taking a pledge to pray and fast for our country. He is recommending 3 things based on the 3 cardinal virtues (does this guy sound like he'll be Catholic soon enough, or what?):

1. Faith - to PRAY, on your knees, every night for our country. Pray for our leaders, our citizens, and re-establish or build further, your relationship with God.

2. Hope - since Hope stems from truth, do not lie for the next 40 days and nights, and hopefully you create a habit of extinguishing this altogether. This includes lying to oneself, or those little "white lies."

3. Charity - which begins at home. So, take at least one day each week and do something nice for every member of your family. Write it down, and do it. Also, realize how blessed we are to live in this nation, and be grateful. Take notice of the things in our lives to be grateful for, particularly the gift of living in the greatest country the world has ever known.

I will be signing the pledge, because our country needs it, and my soul could use some prayer and fasting as well. I encourage you to join me, and offer 40 days and 40 nights for our nation.

A moment of celebration

Today is the first day in 3.5 months that I do not have a drop of spit up on me! Honestly I am praising the Lord - it means Gigi's tummy is finally better.

Mr. Brenner

At my high school (and Chantal's and Applejacs') there was a government teacher/track coach: Mr. Brenner. He always seemed just a little rough around the edges, but he had 3 grown daughters and I'm pretty sure he was a giant softy inside.

I graduated from high school 6 years ago and I still find myself repeating his words almost every day: "Nothing of value is easily earned."

Want to have a relationship with God? It's going to be a struggle that sometimes feels like a one way street. It will take time out of your day and changing your behaviors and attitudes. In the end it's worth it, but that doesn't mean it's going to be easy.

Those first 6 weeks with a new baby when all you do is feed and change diapers on very little sleep is pure boot camp while you earn their trust.

Even having the privilege of owning a home is hard work. My husband literally gives his life to earn money to keep a roof over our head and both of us work hard to maintain it and keep it relatively clean (don't even ask if it's tidy!).

Anyways, I guess my point is, when you are struggling with something you can try repeating this mantra and inviting God to help you. :)

Scheduling Time for Prayer

I recently resolved that I need to give my prayer life a "makeover".  My son is over a year old and I have yet get the hang of fitting prayer into my busy mommy lifestyle.  We try to make it to daily mass a couple of times a week and I say (but not always pray) some prayers out of habit, but it is not enough for me.  Here are my first two goals, maybe you can help keep me accountable!


1. Morning Offering

This seemed so much easier to remember when I had control over what time my alarm woke me up.  These days I try to squeeze in as much sleep as possible before my baby wakes me up.  Once he is awake I must immediately tend to his needs and often postpone my morning prayers until...well, naptime or sometimes even bedtime. 

The morning offering is so important however, especially for moms and anyone with a busy schedule.  When we pray the morning offering, we offer everything-- our joys, our sacrifices, our work, our relationships and our actions-- to Jesus.  In essence, our entire day becomes a prayer, offered up to God.  This is such a gift for moms who do not have time to spend kneeling in a chapel, because suddenly the little things like our chores, the sacrifice in our constant exhaustion, and the love that we share with our children becomes a prayer to Jesus.

Here is an example of a morning offering:

 Oh Jesus, through the immaculate heart of Mary, I offer you my prayers, works, joys and sufferings of this day, in union with the Holy sacrifice of the Mass throughout the world, in thanksgiving for your favors, in reparation for my sins and for all the intentions of my relatives and friends and especially for those of our Holy Father.  Amen.

2.  Time Management

I used to consider time management one of my strongest skills.  During high school and college, I spent half of my waking hours in class and the other half training in dance.   Any spare moments in between were used for homework, studying and some socializing.  Most importantly, I knew what I would be doing at any given time, and could more easily plan my prayers accordingly.  Nowadays my schedule goes according to others, and for this reason it is easy for me to feel unproductive and let my prayer life to slip.  For this reason, I have decided to reevaluate my time management because it should help me to accomplish one primary goal:  to do God's will. 

I have found several tricks of the trade that seem to be helping me use my days in the fullest way possible.  The first one is creating detailed to-do lists.  If a project can be broken down, I list each part separately.  This helps me be most productive, because I feel as though I am accomplishing a task along the way.  I use my cell phone to keep track of one "master to-do list" that I add to constantly and check off items as I finish them.

The second tool that is helping me immensely is to set timers.  When I only have a given amount of time (during my son's naps) to accomplish several things, I literally set my kitchen timer and work on one project at a time until time is up.  This helps me to stay focused on my task, move on to the next job on my list, and to avoid running into distractions.  More than anything, it is helping me to prioritize taking time to rest and pray.  My personality does not like to relax until all of my work is done, but this is virtually impossible with little ones because let's face it, the work never ends.  Designating fifteen-minutes of play time or ten-minutes of constructive rest has helped me find a better Martha vs. Mary balance to my life. 



These ideas might not work for everybody, but I feel confident that by my prayer life will benefit from making my morning offering a priority and attempting to more effectively manage my time.  Perhaps as I strengthen my one-on-one time with Jesus, He will guide me in new ways to deepen my relationship with Him.  How about you, do you have any advice/suggestions for scheduling time to pray?

Follow-Up to previous Pride and Prejudice Post

Check this out...seems I am not the only one who thinks we need to resurrect the courting of Jane Austin's day.

http://www.colleenhammond.com/blog/2010/07/love-and-courtship-in-the-time-of-jane-austen/

The beauty of a praying girl

My husband's friend is beginning to wake up from his drug induced coma following his brain bleed a week ago. It's been a long week for everyone but full of hope and trust in the Lord. One of my best moments through all of this was hearing about my 3 and a half year old niece's response. We told her that her uncle's friend was sick and we asked her to pray for him. Her parents told us that at least once a day, she'll stop what she's doing and tell her parents, "we need to pray a hail Mary for Matt." What a beautiful example of the importance of children. She really is the cutest thing ever (okay so I'm biased.)

Where is that darn light switch??

Do you ever look at something in your life and think that maybe it is a test from God? That maybe He is waiting for you to just trust in Him or learn some lesson? At some point though you wonder if you are just dense and not learning the lesson or if you are missing the point all together. I have been reflecting lately on how much we are in the dark with God. Are we really in the dark because of God or do we just not see the darn light switch?

TV & Toddlers

The USA Today just published a new study showing that too much time watching tv or playing video games can more than double a child's risk of attention problems. Now, you might be thinking "duh," but I know many children who watch far more than the recommended max of 2 hrs/day given by the American Academy of Pediatrics for children 2+. The recommendation for children under 2 is 0 television.

There are many reasons for this, one major one being that their developing brains can't process the quickly moving images as one fluid action and so it's almost like a strobe light effect and the brains are trained to jump so quickly from image to image that they have a difficult time developing the ability to focus. As they grow, they may be able to grasp the visual stimulation, but can't necessarily connect that if a character behaves badly early on in a show, that chastisement or a negative outcome later on is directly related to that wrong action. The child will mimic whatever they see on television simply because they just do what they see. They aren't necessarily capable of discerning right from wrong, especially when it's shown over the course of a half an hour, rather than explained to them concretely (hitting is wrong, sharing is nice).

Another study of the exposure to television at age 2, found that watching too much TV as toddlers later forecasted:

• a seven percent decrease in classroom engagement;
• a six percent decrease in math achievement (with no harmful effects on later reading);
• a 10 percent increase in victimization by classmates (peer rejection, being teased, assaulted or insulted by other students);
• a 13 percent decrease in weekend physical activity;
• a nine percent decrease in general physical activity;
• a 10 percent peak in snacks intake;
• a five percent increase in BMI.

In our home, we've made it a rule to strictly limit television with our children, particularly to none until over the age of 2. My firstborn is approaching her 2nd birthday, and while we have recently been a bit more lax about it, allowing her to watch one show maybe once a week on a day when she's not napping, or something on a long car ride, we have just re-commited our family to no television for her at all. She's turning 2, so the fallen nature is sadly, starting to show itself more, and I don't want to take any chances. Also, I find that when we give in to one show, she wants to watch another, because it is enticing. It's easy, it's entertaining, but it's not the best thing for her development, as science continues to show us. It is incredibly challenging as a parent to avoid it, and it's certainly not the end of the world if they watch a bit on a special occassion, or when parent is out of commission, but I know it's a habit I want to strive to avoid.

I highly encourage all parents to check out these recent articles:

TV, Video Games and Attention Span

Toddlers and TV

This Scares Me...

http://www.newsweek.com/2010/07/07/should-the-birth-control-pill-be-sold-without-a-prescription.html

...a lot!

Are You Prepared?

It seems as though every part of the world has been rocking and rolling lately!  Yesterday's quake reminded me that I need to get an emergency disaster kit together for my home and family.  I researched suggestions on what to pack, and here are some helpful items to include.

1. Water

• 1 gallon of water per person, per day.  Be prepared for a 72-hour period.  Two or three gallons of water per person (don't forget pets).

2.  Food

• Ready-to-eat canned juice, fruits, meats, vegetables, milk.  
• Jar of Peanut Butter or non-salted nuts.
• Dried cereals, crackers, granola bars (avoid foods that make you thirsty).
• Baby food/formula or pet food if needed.
• A non-electric can opener.

3.  First Aid Kit and Manual

• Pain relievers, laxatives, sunscreen.

4.  Two flashlights and batteries
5.  Battery-operated radio and batteries
6.  Tools

• A pipe wrench for turning off gas and water valves.
• Matches in a waterproof container.
• A whistle.

7.  Some cash and important documents

• Passports, insurance cards, financial records, copies of ID cards.

8. Clothing and Bedding

• Blankets or sleeping bags.
• Sturdy shoes.
• Spare eyeglasses/sunglasses.
• Warm-clothes (depending on the weather in your area).

9.  Special Needs

• Medications, contact lens solutions, diapers, toilet paper, sanitation and hygiene items.

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/earthquakes/archive/ready.dtl
itmattersareyouprepared.org/images/EQSAFETYCHECKLIST.pdf
American Red Cross

The power of touch

One of my husband's best friends was admitted to the hospital yesterday with a brain bleed. He is 34 years old and there was little to no idea that he had such high blood pressure that could cause the bleeding. His wife rushed him the the emergency room when he woke up early yesterday morning. He and his wife have only been married for 2 and a half weeks, the actually got married on our first anniversary. We spent yesterday in the hospital surrounded by people who were there to support their friend and await his recovery. Currently he's in a drug induced coma and the doctor's tell us it will be a waiting game to see if he'll recover and if so, what the extent of the damage will be. Events like this of course make everyone stop and realize how precious life is. We don't know how long we're here on earth or when we'll have to say goodbye to someone we love. It always reminds people to say "I love you" to those certain people so that you're sure they know how you feel. I realized all of this yesterday but I had a really unique experience at one point in the day. My husband's friend's wife went back to see him in ICU and she asked if I wanted to go with her. Many people had been back to see him, but I had not. As part of the healing process the doctor's have placed him in a drug induced coma and put him on a ventilator so that his body doesn't have to do a lot of work and instead can rest and hopefully the bleeding will clot and then stop. They want his blood pressure to be 115-122 over 60 - just a normal pressure. His wife and I were watching the blood pressure machine to see how he was doing. It was fluctuating between 120-123. Then she went to touch him and it slowed down. It stayed between about 117-119. He needed to his wife. He needed to feel her calming touch. She was there with him, he could relax. I know the Lord is working on him and I know of course the power of the Lord is infinitely greater than ours, but I was also reminded yesterday that a simple touch of the hand can sooth the heart. His parent's are very faithful and hoping for a miracle. At the end of the day his mother told us all - for those of you that believe in God, you're expecting a miracle, and for those of you that don't your about to see one. What a wonderful woman of God, testifying to His greatness even in the midst of tragedy. We'll continue to pray for him and his family, most especially for his new wife. It really brings the vows "in sickness and in health" to life.

For all you moms out there...

"Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs in my field, since the payment is pure love" - Mildred B. Vermont

Saintly Wisdom, fo

"People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway."~ Mother Teresa

Super Easy Enchiladas

Ingredients:

9x13 Pyrex and another Pyrex for the extra ones that don't fit

12 chicken tenders or 4 chicken breasts

LOTS of grated cheese

12 tortillas

1 can of Enchilada sauce (our fave is Rosarita)

Chives

Sour cream for dipping and garnishing if desired

Instructions:

Bake the chicken at 375 degrees for 25-30 minutes until cooked all the way through. No need to season. Once finished cut or shred it into small pieces. Pour some enchilada sauce in the bottom of your Pyrex pans. Make your enchiladas by rolling some chicken and cheese into a tortilla. Place in the pan. Repeat until you're out of chicken. Pour enchilada sauce on top, cover with grated cheese, then chop some chives and throw them on top for some color. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes until hot all the way through. Top with sour cream and enjoy!

One Person Can Change the World

“I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something. And because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do the something I can do.”

~ Edward Hale

I recently re-found this quote. I used in a paper that I wrote in high school that I happened to stumble upon.

This quote can go in a lot of different directions. But, there are a few particular things that stand out. 

Society today has a mindset that what we do does not matter nor does it made a difference to anyone else. It saddens me greatly to think that people feel this way, especially in a time where there is so many ways to communicate and connect with others. Society today also tries to tell us that not even everyone's life is worth it! 

I've heard that there are six degrees of separation between everyone! And with the growth of the internet and modern technology, think about how much smaller the world is becoming! 

Everyone's actions changes those around them. And with six degrees of separation, that could go a long way. A simple smile in the grocery store when you are having a bad day makes that day a better one. A hug from a friend when you are lonely can be a God-send! 

Even people who society considers outcasts and of no use can change people lives!

My mom and brothers are the perfect example of this. 

When I was growing up, many people would come up to my mom and say "Oh, are they ALL your kids?" and my mom would answer, "Yes!". People seemed shocked and would continue to ask "Are they adopted?" And of course my mom responded, "Nope, they are all mine!"

People seemed shocked that my mom would want to continue to have kids even after her second child had disabilities. But, without my mom having each of her children, even the ones that she miscarried, I would not have become the woman I am today. 

I would have a different view of the world. My friends would not have been able to hang out at my house and see all the fun chaos that I grew up in!

And, at my little brother's funeral, the Church would not have been so full that there was barely any standing room.

So, if you ask me, everyone's life is important and crucial to the life of everyone else. Each decision made has an impact on those around you. 

I will do what I can, and I will do the rest "Through Christ Who Strengthens Me." (Philippians 4:13.)

Being Open to Life

I was recently reflecting about the "openness to life" that our faith calls married couples to.  I realize that this can be a hot topic for many faithful Catholics regarding when/why using Natural Family Planning is morally acceptable. Nevertheless, this debate is not my focus.  Instead I found myself reflecting on the annunciation.

These days it seems as though there are many more "reasons" NOT to have children than ever.  For example, society says that simply being a "newlywed" qualifies couples to refrain from openness to life.  For some newlyweds the adjustment to marriage may constitute a serious reason to postpone children, but this (and other grave factors) are not what I am referring to.  Isn't it odd that babies who arrive 9 months after a honeymoon are suprising (and few) nowadays?  Society tells us to take two, five, ten years to get to know each other, buy a home, travel ect... and then we can start thinking about "trying".  Perhaps it is not the children who should be postponed, but rather the wedding date!

When we examine Mary's situation from our own cultural perspective, we realize that she had every reason not to be open to life.  She was barely a teenager, very poor and unmarried.   If you consider the world she lived in, these reasons could constitute even more graveness than they would today.  There was no Medicaid, no crisis pregnancy centers or shelters, and adultery could be punished by death.  Despite this however, Mary said YES to life.  It is through her YES, her fiat, that Jesus our salvation, came into the world.  Moreover, it might be also be fair to point out that God only asked Mary to be receptive to a child once in her life.  God's will for the Holy Family was to always remain a home of three.  This is also a reminder for us as Catholics, that a marriage that is open-to-life will not always fill a twelve-passenger van.

There are many wonderful Church documents such as Humanae Vitae and the Catechism of the Church that can help us understand the Church's teaching on Christian marriages.  Ultimately, husbands and wives must always pray to follow Mary's example of "thy will be done".  Only He knows what is best for our marriages and families.  It is by following God's will that we can work to build a culture of life... and what is more beautiful than that?

Homily Week #3

I'm really excited about keeping up with Matthew Kelly's idea about listening for one thing in the homily to reflect on during the week. Please note this does not mean I don't listen to the rest, I just make sure I take at least one point with me for the week.
Sunday June 27th readings are all about following the Lord. Here they are so you can check them out - Reading 1: 1 Kgs 19:16b, 19-21 Reading 2: Gal 5:1, 13-18 and the Gospel: Lk 9:51-62.
The homily talked mostly about following the Lord, but the Priest quickly mentioned the idea of looking back when times get hard. He mentioned how people have a tenedency to "think back" to when times were easier or when we were happier and how that action can make people feel more upset by their current circumstances. He encouraged us in those moments to remember that following the Lord means being present with Him at all times. We must always push through with Him as our focus so that we can continue to unite ourselves with His will instead of focusing on what our will wants. I'm hearing a lot of trusting in the Lord and desiring His will these past few weeks. Perhaps I should start listening :)