Happy Birthday Mother Mary!

Today we celebrate Our Lady's birthday! Praise God for the gift of Our Lady! She welcomes us with open arms! She invites us to ask for her help to intercede for us to her Son.

In honor of Pope Francis' recent call to prayer and fasting for peace, here is a prayer to Our Lady for Peace:
Mary, Mother of God, my mother, Queen of Peace, ask your Son Jesus to
give me the gift of peace. Pray for me for peace; peace in my heart, peace
of mind and of soul, peace in my family, peace with all whom I meet, the
peace of Jesus.
Jesus, my Lord and Savior, my Brother, King of Peace, I come to you
with Mary, Queen of Peace, to ask you humbly for a new outpouring of the
gift of peace. Pour out on me your Holy Spirit of Peace.
Give me peace, Jesus, peace within myself, peace in my family, peace in
my everyday life. Give peace to my nation, and to all nations, peace among
all peoples, peace in the world.
Jesus, my mediator with the Father, take me to the Father to pray for
peace.
Father, Father of Jesus, our Father, my Father, I come to you with your
Son Jesus. In Him and with Him and through Him I pray for peace.
Amen.

Are you in need of a special request? Here is a website with many prayers to Our Lady for many situations and requests!
Prayers to Mary, Our Mother

Prepared for Attack, Not Love

So, three months ago, I bore our little son. Being our third baby here (one in heaven), we prepared for his coming in all different ways: boy clothes, new diaper inserts, switching rooms around, re-reading birthing techniques books, etc., etc.

We also prepared ourselves for the main attack: other people's comments.

I had heard horror stories from my friends about the comments you'll get about how you're overpopulating the world and you must be having kids because you have nothing better to do, or just exclamations of "3 in 4 years!" or "Better you than me!" and the like.

Now, I am that classic person who can never think of a good response until about 2 hours after I should have said it. And for some reason I was determined not to let someone say something rude without having a good response. So I thought for oh... 9 months about what I would say. I'd play different scenarios in my head and come up with snappy replies.  If they say this; I'll say THIS! If that, I'll quip back THAT! No unthinking pseudo-intellectual grocery shopper will get the better of me! (Because, really, don't all those comments happen when shopping for groceries?)

However, for the past 3 months, I've been completely caught off-guard by people's comments. So loving. So kind. I walk down an isle and I swear some women start to coo. I live in the Northwest where people are known to be standoff-ish, but I have had more people talk to me since having our little one than I ever remember before. They stop me and tell me all about how they had 3 kids and how they just loved them. How their kids were close together, and how much they loved playing together (and are still close as adults!). How they love that my girls are in pretty girly clothes and my boy is in blue. How cute he is. How cute the girls are. How they can tell the girls are good big sisters. How much they want a baby. How much just seeing the kids gives them the baby bug. How their grandkids are about my kids' ages. Sometimes we'll get told funny stories of what their kids used to do when they were little (and now the grandkids are doing the same things, which made the granddad who told us one story SO happy!)

Honestly, it is almost overpowering.

The last time I went to the store a lady stopped me and we must have talked for about 10 minutes (baby was asleep and the girls just weighed our bag of tomatoes about 4,982 times). Turns out she has 3 kids, 2 girls and a boy. They have grown up and now she is expecting her first grandchild in Jan. and her second in March. She told me all about them and ended with "They are wonderful. Just wonderful." Then she looked at mine for a couple seconds and said "And so are yours. I can tell. They will be wonderful!"

I love it. I love all of it. It's not that we didn't used to get comments. We definitely did before, but it's different now. People are more open. I somehow think it's because it's expected that you'll have 1 or 2 kids. But 3 kids - especially so close together - you only have on purpose. You only have because you love having kids. And everyone loves kids. Even grouchy people smile when a baby smiles at them. And so I feel like I have a sign on me saying "Yes. I obviously love kids. Come tell me if you do too!"

So when I do get some negative comment, which I'm sure I will, and I forget my planned out, snappy response, I hope I remember all the loving comments. I also hope the grouch gets stuck in line with me while a chatty grandma who is missing her grandkids decides to dote on mine. Then they'll witness the only natural and proper response to kids: love.

Slowing Down

There was an article posted a couple weeks ago that really caught my attention. It is about a mom who was constantly telling her daughter to "hurry up". It was only when her older daughter made a comment about her sister being slow did the mom start to realize she was " a bully who pushed and pressured and hurried a small child who simply wanted to enjoy life." 

This article really made me think about how I try to keep to somewhat of a schedule throughout the day and got frustrated when things don't go according to my plan. Then I thought about how much time is taken out of each day to be WITH my children. Sure we are "with" each other all day every day, but how much of my time is devoted to them and what they want to do instead of what I tell them we are doing. Now in my defense I have had 5 babies (one in heaven, 4 on earth) in the last 7 years and I am busy! But none the less, they needed my attention more, so I decided to devote (and this sounds lame, but) at least 15 to 20 minutes a day doing what THEY want to do. You guys want to have a water fight? Okay, the dishes can wait. You want to play Legos? Okay, I guess dinner doesn't HAVE to be at 6.  I could go on and on... These changes have really improved my relationship with them. I see how God created them each differently. They all have different interests and it is fun to see and play with them. Tony, 6, always asks to play sports. John Paul, 4, wants to pretend or read a book and Jimmer, 3, wants to be pushed on the swing. I try to divide my time and sometimes we even all play together! You should see me trying to teach them how to play baseball, classic!

I should note that this was just over the summer and now I have started homeschooling again. I have found that I have a much better attitude during our school day and I don't worry about just "getting it done". My oldest just started 1st grade and so the work load is a full day, much different from an hour of kindergarten last year. We are about to start our third week so we are still getting back into school mode. I have lots to learn about managing a household and school, but thankfully my husband is 100% behind me and is patient with me as I try to manage everything. Please keep us in your prayers.

Here is the website the article was on (you might have to copy and paste):
http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/3624798

Adventures in Homeschooling, Part 1

Hooray! We have just finished our first week of kindergarten homeschooling, and I still have hair! For those of you who are experienced homeschooling moms, you're probably thinking, chill out lady, but this is a whole new world for me, as I attended both private and public schools, and didn't know a single home-schooled child growing up. That said, I am fully committed to this endeavor, at least mentally.

In the fall of last year, I officially started homeschooling our 4 year old daughter using Seton's pre-K curriculum. It was cute, comprehensive, and she really enjoyed it. More than anything, I did it for my own self-discipline, because I am a creature of habit, and I knew that if we were going to go this route, I'd better start training myself now. I told my husband that I knew this was the best thing for her and our family in my mind, but I did not "want" to do it. However, we were going with what I knew to be true, not so much what I felt like, because the more I study theology, the more I learn that our reason should guide us and our emotions, not the other way around. Easier said than done, but I knew what I had to do...

My little pre-schooler flew through most of her school work. We had days where she insisted that one should write 3's like capital E's, or that D makes that T sound, and I realized, this is why I'm doing this. It's not easy and it doesn't come naturally to me, but that's why this is good for me, as well as her. My daughter is also a typical daddy's girl, so if anyone in the home butts heads, it's us, but that's also why I'm doing this. We need to find a way to communicate and understand one another for better or worse. She's stuck with me as her mother, and I love that. Surprise, surprise, we're bonding. I'm doing this because I believe it's best for our souls.


Children have a natural right to be educated primarily by their parents. Our brains with their ability to reason are what separate us from the rest of the animal kingdom. They take much of our life to form. Just as we spend those first few years, watching what we eat and do so carefully as we house them in our bodies, and then nurse them, introduce foods cautiously, baby proof the house, etc., how much more should we monitor what's going into their minds, as their souls approach the age of reason. Homeschooling is on the rise in our nation today, for countless reasons, and there are a multitude that led us to this decision. We'll take it day by day, but for now, one week into kindergarten, not only is my mind set on this path, but my heart is now warm to the idea.


In just a few days I've learned so much about my daughter's strengths and areas for improvement. I've played with my kids in a focused manner, blocking out phone calls & text messages. I was able to reward both for a job well done, rather than banishing to the corner (which happened later on, but not during school hours;-)) Here's a big one... we made it to noon mass! Over the summer I was waking up and going at 6:30am because wake up times were less predictable and we were usually too hectic midday to remember to get to mass. This week, however, we did it more than once! I'm not trying to boast, I'm just genuinely impressed that the regularity of the school schedule has helped us all to be more efficient, more organized, and more punctual. It is definitely a form of self-donation, educating one's children, but I'm learning the joys of it.To be continued...

Toy Organization System

I realize that this is a First World problem, but nevertheless, it affects all of us here:  Too. Many. Toys!  My oldest child is only four, and although we rarely purchase toys ourselves, as a result of several Christmases, birthday parties and hand-me-downs, we have already accumulated quite a collection.

About a year ago, I began to notice that the more toys we had out, the less the children would play with them.  They would simply get too overwhelmed with the piles of toys to focus on one activity for a length of time.  I also struggled to keep our "farm set", blocks, dress-up ensembles and other pieced collections together.  We would end up with parts here and there, making it too much work to put together and enjoy.

I decided to take on the battle of the toys.  I simplified and gave many toys away.  Anything that was broken or had missing pieces was tossed.  I also started trying to stay away from any branded characters, or battery-powered toys with only one function that the kids did not play with anymore.  Baby toys that I wanted to keep for future siblings were stored away.  Despite all of this work, many of our gifted toys are very fun and beautiful, this made it very difficult to weed through them!

About six-months ago I came up with a toy organization system that has been working very well for our entire family!  One night after the kids had gone to bed, I gathered all of our toys and put them in the middle of our living room.  I did not include a small basket of bath toys, or our bikes and outdoor playthings.  I had five large empty tupperware bins (yes, five!) that I carefully filled our toys into. One-by-one, I organized and stored our toys into the bins until all of the toys were put away.  Our lego set went into one of the boxes, all of our train accessories into another.  I made sure that our mass kit was stored with the priest costume, and our tool set was stored with the construction hats, and combined any other toys that the kids typically enjoyed playing with together.  I labeled each box 1 through 5, and stored them in our large entryway closet.

Each day we take out one toy box.  I don't worry about picking up the toys too much throughout the day, because with just about 5 or 6 toys out, it never gets too overwhelming.  My boys are expected to put the toys back in the tupperware in the evening before bath time, thus greatly simplifying "clean-up time".  Then I store the toy box, and pull out a different one the following day (once in awhile we keep the box out for two or three days, when we are really enjoying it).

It is incredible to see the kids actually play with their beautiful toys again.   It has also been very helpful in keeping our sets and collections together, so that pieces do not get lost and we can enjoy the entire toy together.  We never get tired or bored, because we are constantly pulling out toys that we have not played with for at least four days.  It is a wonderful system for parents too, because we are no longer constantly cleaning up.  I love that at the end of the day, all of the toys are put away and out-of-sight; something all too wonderful for some grown-up time.

If you need help simplifying the toys you own, I couldn't recommend more highly the book Simplicity Parenting.  Happy Toy-Organizing!

It's almost Our Lady's birthday...

On September 8 the Church celebrates the feast of the Birth of Mary. We don't actually know her real birthday, but tradition holds that she was the only child of St. Anne and St Joachim. According to my book, Marian Devotions in the Domestic Church, "this feast was celebrated by Christians in Syria and Palestine as early as the sixth century, when on a particular Sept. 8 a church in Jerusalem was consecrated in Mary's honor. Over the next several centuries observance spread to the Western Church; by the Middle Ages it was a public holy day and remained a day of obligation until 1918."

Well, our parish is having our annual picnic that day and I've ordered a birthday cake with blue and white roses (yay Costco!). We've planned on having all the tables covered in tablecloths of varying shades of blue and the picture is of the placemats I'm writing on. Each one says "Happy birthday Mary!" and it has a title of Our Lady. More pictures later with, but what are your favorite titles so I can be sure to include them? I've still got 20 mats to go!

Also, don't forget to celebrate at home! Make or buy a cake or cupcakes and sing to Our Lady. Kids love to sing happy birthday! Got a blue tablecloth? Bust it out for one night. Grab leftover party hats ,banners, blowers, etc and you've got an evening the kids will LOVE and will build a Catholic culture in your home. 😀

Ordinary Miracle

Often throughout the day we are bombarded with so many distractions. We have so much "stuff" to do. We go, go, go. Between the diaper changes and preparing meals, keeping the kids playing and entertained and keeping the house in order, working and commuting, going to school and studying, we don't stop to admire the ordinary miracles throughout the day. The single rose that just bloomed in your otherwise empty garden. The splash of clouds on a beautifully sunny day. The large tree shading a nice grassy area on a scorching hot summer day. The pounding rain that soothes your child to sleep. The clap of thunder that sends your child running into your arms for comfort. 

We let these miracles slip by without a thought. Seeing them as inconveniences. Wishing them away.

Although there are many glorious, unrepeatable miracles God has given us, there are many miracles so ordinary, we forget to thank God for these gifts. We forget to stop and smell the roses in our heavily saturated world of distractions from the truly important moments in life. Instead of embracing those moments

of your child's embrace that will be quickly outgrown, seeing each meal as one step in their growth, knowing the rain will bring forth many blessings, and feeling the warmth of the sun keeping us warm, we forget that God is showing us Himself and His love for us.

As Saint Bonaventure said, "If there is anyone who is not enlightened by this sublime magnificence of created things, he is blind. If there is anyone who, seeing all these works of God, does not praise Him, he is dumb; if there is anyone who, from so many signs, cannot perceive God, that man is foolish."

And, 

"In everything, whether it is a thing sensed or a thing known, God Himself is hidden within. "

Embrace your ordinary miracles this week and Praise God!

 

 

 

Re-Defining Beauty

Yes. This is, in fact, a new blog post. (What? Quick, check the date. September. What year? This year! Nice.) Our lives have been busy (as all lives are) but we here are feeling called to once again take to our keyboards and write about our lives, our faith, and the beauty we see (and try to be) in this world. I was thinking about beauty and what to write and I remembered hearing a quote from Pope Benedict about how the world needs beauty, and how true beauty always leads to God. But I guess I forgot to pin it, so in searching for it, I found this: 

"What is capable of restoring enthusiasm and confidence, what can encourage the human spirit to rediscover its path, to raise its eyes to the horizon, to dream of a life worthy of its vocation -- if not beauty?" 

Still Pope Benedict. He said it in his Address to Artists. And really - I think this says what I wanted to say about this blog. I think we all write not just to get our thoughts down, or to help us keep ourselves thinking about the different aspects of beauty (when I know I'm going to write soon, I tend to think about what I could say when my mind wanders. And since it wanders a lot - it's nice to be almost continually thinking about beauty). But I think we write to help restore enthusiasm and confidence. To encourage ourselves and others to find/rediscover our path. To raise our eyes to the Son on the horizon and to dream and then act on what our lives would be like if we truly fulfilled our vocations. I thought it was a nice thought. Maybe nicer than the original one I had been thinking of. And so I think I'll end this post how Pope Benedict ended his talk:

"Let the beauty that you express by your God-given talents always direct the hearts of others to glorify the Creator, the source of all that is good. God's blessings upon you all!"

Adoro te devote - St. Thomas Aquinas

Prostrate I adore Thee, Deity unseen,

Who Thy glory hidest 'neath these shadows mean;

Lo, to Thee surrendered, my whole heart is bowed,

Tranced as it beholds Thee, shrined within the cloud.

Taste, and touch, and vision, to discern Thee fail;

Faith, that comes by hearing, pierces through the veil.

I believe whate'er the Son of God hath told;

What the Truth hath spoken, that for truth I hold.

On the Cross lay hidden but thy Deity,

Here is hidden also Thy Humanity:

But in both believing and confessing, Lord,

Ask I what the dying thief of Thee implored.

Thy dread wounds, like Thomas, though I cannot see,

His be my confession, Lord and God, of Thee,

Make my faith unfeigned ever-more increase,

Give me hope unfading, love that cannot cease.

O memorial wondrous of the Lord's own death;

Living Bread, that giveth all Thy creatures breath,

Grant my spirit ever by Thy life may live,

To my taste Thy sweetness never-failing give.

Pelican of mercy, Jesus, Lord and God,

Cleanse me, wretched sinner, in Thy Precious Blood:

Blood where one drop for human-kind outpoured

Might from all transgression have the world restored.

Jesus, whom now veiled, I by faith descry,

What my soul doth thirst for, do not, Lord, deny,

That thy face unveiled, I at last may see,

With the blissful vision blest, my God, of Thee. Amen

"For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood; but against principalities and powers, against the rulers of the world of this darkness, against the spirits of wickedness in the high places." (Ephesians 6:12)

Month of Mary

Just a little food for thought before May is over...
The following is taken from the May 2012 Magnificat and is by Heather King:

"At the cross her station keeping/ Stood the mournful Mother weeping/ Close to Jesus at the last." Thus runs the thirteenth-century Latin hymn known as the Stabat Mater: "The mother was standing."

Still standing.  Through giving birth in a stable: still standing.  Through a prophecy that her heart would be pieced by a sword: still standing.  Through watching from the foot of the cross as her Son was totured to death: still standing.  In the three to fifteen years she purportedly lived after Christ died: still standing, still believing, still finding joy and meaning.

Mary, who probably couldn't read but who took care of the baby and cooked the meals, is our greatest saint.  To be a mother is to stretch yourself as far as you can possibly go.  It is to say, There! That is everything I have; that is my blood, my heart, my bone marrow.  And it is then to be called to give in yet a different way, a different direction.  Just when the mother wants to rest, she is called to more openness of heart, more self-emptying, more patience, more work, more letting go, more love....

Mary knew better than anyone, next to Christ himself, the suffering of the cross.  For a mother to witness the brutal execution of an innocent Son- the fruit of her deepest procreative urge, the object of her most profound self-giving- is perhaps the most excruciating form of suffering a woman can endure.  A mother would die for her child, Mary watched her child die for her.

"Mary was the Mother Incarnate and her sacrifice was quite simply the complete acceptance of that which happened to her Son, which meant the death of every shred of possessiveness,"  writes Dante scholar Helen M. Luke.

The death of possessiveness; the birth of God.  "My soul doth magnify the Lord," Mary sang, heavy with child, as she journeyed to visit her cousin Elizabeth in "the hill country."  What simplicity.  What confidence.  What humility.  What purity-for in order to magnify God, you have to become transparent yourself. 

We are all so afraid of falling through the cracks, of being forgotten, of aging, of dying.  But if you don't want to be forgotten, we learn from Mary, value your soul more than success or riches or fame.  Serve Christ instead of yourself.  Become a model of creative suffering, patient endurance, and the erotic urge channeled, contained, and focused into a white-hot flame.

For purity endures. It is Mary who is venerated throughout the world, from the lowest places to the highest, not Cleopatra.  It is Mary to whom we pray the rosary, not Marilyn Monroe.  It is Mary we appeal to for help, for comfort, for solace, for understanding, not Salome.

Every follower of Christ spends a long "December"- maybe many Decembers - in a stable.  But May means to burst, with Mary, ever Virgin, into our fullest, most fecund flower.--

One in a Million!

Hey Everyone!

For those who have not heard yet, my brothers officially have a diagnosis! After over 21 years, we are finally starting to get some answers!

To find out more... Check out this link: Luckiest Family

Have a blessed day!

Holy Saturday

Holy Saturday has always been a rather weird day for me.

Jesus is dead and buried, but we know He's going to rise on Sunday. So you feel somber but also excited for the next day. You feel weird doing an Easter Egg hunt, but also know that the pain has ended (and it just works out better time-wise that way). I make my mom's Easter bread to get ready for Sunday, but am not sure if I should watch a movie while doing it. After all, Lent's done. The 40 days are spent, right? Usually end up watching something "God-ish" by way of merging the two. After that I'm not sure what to do. Mostly, I feel like I'm waiting for something. Which I am. But what to do in the mean time? Most years... yard work.

Just a weird day. Why put it in there?

This year, however, I understand.

My husband and I miscarried our 3rd baby a couple weeks ago. And what I felt after we found out, I still do not understand. I was sad that our baby was gone. In fact, by the time we found out, they figure the baby had been dead for at least a week. But, being of faith, I knew that our baby was in Heaven, happier than anyone around me. But I wasn't ready for that. I couldn't focus yet on our risen little one. I needed time to feel confused and mourn. His death was complete, I just had the effects to deal with. I knew that I would soon feel better, feel his prayers for myself and my family working in my life. I just needed time.

I needed a Holy Saturday.

“Most of us love a non-self, or something extrinsic and apart from our inner life; but a mother's love during the time she is a flesh-and-blood ciborium is not for a non-self but for one that is her very self, a perfect example of charity and love which hardly perceives a separation. Motherhood then becomes a kind of priesthood. She brings God to man by preparing the flesh in which the soul will be implanted; she brings man to God in offering the child back again to the Creator.”
 

Fulton J. Sheen, Life Is Worth Living

One door closes, another opens...

After listing our condo for over three months without any offers or leads, we've decided to stay put. Our plan is to save up for a down payment and pay down our current loan, so that we could hopefully be ready to move in 1.5 to 2 years.

Although I was surprised that our beautiful little home did not sell, this was one of those experiences were God clearly gave us a red light. We did our part-- made the upgrades, kept things tidy, escaped for the many ( many) showings. We submitted our offer on our desired home and sent in all of the paperwork that was needed. Our plan to move was in His hands and the outcome was definitely out of our control.

There is something very peaceful about events where God clearly opens or closes the door. The situation sets us up to trust in His plan.

On the other hand, there are many areas of my life that would be much simpler if I could just let go. Yet, for some reason I resist him, often kicking and screaming at the same time. I make life more complicated. Dominic skips his nap and I turn into a grouch. Gabriel wakes up every hour and I let it out on My husband or a friend. I forget that all these small everyday occurrences are also from God, and thus need to be accepted peacefully. (and yes, if you haven't noticed, a lot of my frustration is rooted in my children's inability to sleep). Sometimes it is because my will is not uniform with His, but more often it is because I fail to trust. He knows what is best!

I love lent because it truly is a season to simplify things. It is like a spiritual, mental and physical housecleaning that helps me to focus on what is important. It is time to get rid of that clutter that complicates my life, and put the nitty gritty of my days entirely in his hands. Maybe things won't be as crystal clear as a house sale, job offer, or new baby. But every minute brings an opportunity to grow in grace by accepting our situation, or fighting it. And perhaps one day I will learn to let it be.