My husband and I have been married a year as of June 20th and although we want 8 kids, we haven't been blessed with any yet. Pregnancy is a hard topic for me since it's something I so desire but have not experienced it yet. I have learned a lot about trusting in the Lord and realizing that my desires are not always the same as His plans for me. I know I should know this already but I'm still learning how to really trust in Him. I hear verses such as "I know the plans I have for you" ... "Be still and know that i am God" but maybe I haven't put them all into practice quite yet.
One of the hardest things for me in the struggle of not having children is when people assume we don't want them or make comments about how they are "planning" their families or "expecting" that God will provide a child to them in an easy manner. Women just expect they'll get pregnant but it doesn't just "happen" for all of us.
I have also seen the beauty of the Lord's plans for my marriage. Some people have mentioned that not having children right away can make a couple selfish. This is hard for me to hear since I don't want to be selfish but we're also not having children. It has given my husband and I a chance to spend time getting to know each other, but we only have this time because the Lord is giving it to us. It's not because we're choosing through contraception or planning to avoid children, that decision is being made for us. This time the Lord has given me has allowed me to serve others and prepare for (God willing) becoming a parent. This summer my husband and I got to drive across the country at the spur of the moment. Please keep in mind that we would give up all of these experiences for the chance to be parents, but rather than being sad or bitter I am trying to focus on the good the Lord is doing. Finally He just gave me a part time teaching job that will allow me to pay off some student loan debt that has been hanging over our head. Thank you Lord for that gift for when we are given the gift of children through birth or adoption, I will be a stay at home mom- God willing.
Please pray for those of us that are awaiting the Lord's gift of children, that someday we will be able to experience that joy as well. For those of you that are wonderful mothers, thank you for your inspiration and dedication to your children! Mary, mother of Christ, show us how to tend to our children in the way only you can!
4 comments:
This one really speaks to my heart...my husband and I have been married almost two years and are in the same boat. We thought we'd be able to start a family by now, but have to trust God's plan that it's not His will for us yet.
A good friend of mine went through the same thing and keeps reminding me to not worry and to enjoy this time with my husband because we won't always have this time together! It's hard, but it's true.
Prayers for you and your husband, and for all those who yearn for children but aren't parents yet : )
I totally agree! It's hard because, like you said, people expect that we don't want to have children yet... and things like that, and I'm sure some of them think we are on some type of birthcontrol.... so it definitely does make it hard when people say things like that!
We can't wait til God Blesses us with kids, we just keep focusing on God's will not ours <3
Not only is this a good reminder not to ever judge couples on the size of their family, but it's also good for those of us moms buried in the daily sacrifices of parenting. It reminds me that my daughter is a gift, and even when bringing sleepless nights, or restless days, she is an immense blessing, and I must constantly thank God for the gift of her in my life.
No matter when or how the children come, the bottom line is, Father always knows best!
Aren't we lucky to have such a great Father! Becksterslabratory and Alena ... you'll be in our prayers too!
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